I am constantly sharing the amazingness of growing; there is so much power in expanding your awareness and mentality to think differently to create an entirely new reality for yourself. It can be such a fulfilling and exciting journey.
But, it can come at a cost….
I see it as my due diligence to share EVERYTHING, and this is something I have seen in my life and in so many of my clients’ lives. Many of my clients, myself included, show up to transform who we are. Not necessarily because we don’t like who we are, but usually because we crave a fuller and happier life.
Think about it. Everyone in your life is used to you operating a certain way… some of us like to please others and make other people comfortable with who we are and so, we typically continue being the person that fits the mold we have created for ourselves! The people in your current life are a part of your world because of who you are in this current moment and they are comfortable with that, and many of them love you for that! It’s awesome, but choosing to grow means you want to CHANGE!
It’s the cost of “doing business” as I call it or in other words the cost of growth!
All of a sudden you decide to grow and want to change the way you make decisions, take chances, and create new habits.
One of my favorite things my boyfriend says is every conversation we have is one we have with ourselves and someone else is involved! That means the way every single person interacts with others and perceives you is a reflection of their own conversations they have with themselves and the same goes for you!
And then one day, you want to change the conversations you are having with yourself and the way you do things. YOU CHANGE! And sometimes the people around you don’t! It’s possible they may not like that the person they once knew isn’t operating the same way they always have!
You can’t blame them! They weren’t ready to change… you were!
Many of my clients transform and become so excited and passionate about their growth, realizing then that not everyone is happy about it or supports it! Sometimes I spend weeks with clients coaching them on this and they ultimately get to decide! Is their dream life worth it? Are they willing to allow other people to choose how they respond and in turn continue to grow anyway? It may inspire the people they surround themselves with and it may make them mad; they want you to stay this way so they can stay comfortable, and that’s why they aren’t the ones growing!
I used to resist people saying “you’ve changed”… I thought, “I am the same loving, passioniate person I have always been AND I have decided to share more of her with the world.”
I worked against this for a long time; trying to convince myself I could be this new version of me and the old version all at once… but I couldn’t, and you may not be able to either! It’s like realizing you can breathe and then trying to suffocate yourself back to a person who is gasping for breath!
My life changed when I stopped resisting the fact that I was the one who changed!
Ultimately, you get to decide whether who you want to be is worthy and fearless enough to be willing to sacrifice some relationships and people who knew and loved the old you, for the new you! This is something for you to find out, but I want to warn you it’s the cost of growth and you need to decide if you’re willing to take the risk.
There will be some who love you unconditionally and will love you regardless and think your growth is amazing and will decide to grow with you, and that’s really exciting! But it can be painful to see who won’t and I hope you can learn to let them go! They have done nothing wrong, they just aren’t ready and may never be, and that’s okay!Because you have changed and they didn’t! I hope you can love those people and if you have to, let them go, and continue to pursue your growth and become the most badass version of yourself!
If you find yourself outgrowing the people around you, find a tribe or create your own! I know I am always looking for new kick-ass women who are on a mission so I welcome you to mine!
So cheers to the woman you once were, be thankful for her and the people in her life because it led you to this very moment, and cheers to the woman you are now and the woman you will become. I support you, love you and lend you my strength to say yes to her and fearlessly chase the best version of you.