Lindsey: Hi, welcome to The Life Coach Hotline. This is Lindsey Mango, your life coach. How can I help you?
Kaitlynn: Hi, Lindsey, my name is Kaitlynn and I’m dying to get some coaching on, I think, just pressure that I’m putting on myself. Recently I’ve quit my nine to five job to go full-time in my own coaching and I’m noticing that my results aren’t happening on the timeline that I want. And I think I’m living and staying stuck in fear and putting a lot of pressure on feeling like the things that I’m doing right now, whether it’s in my business or even in my life, aren’t giving me the results that I want. So I’m feeling pressure-y.
Lindsey: Okay, perfect. So I’m going to ask a couple of questions. What happens for you when you feel pressure? Like, kind of lay that out for me.
Kaitlynn: I feel it physically in my body. I know that, I kind of just buffer. And I know it’s like we’ve talked about this before, I just don’t take action or I do too many things. I’m like both.
Lindsey: Okay, perfect. The reason why I want to ask is I think it’s really important because I think sometimes certain emotions get kind of bad raps or bad names. And I’m like, it all depends on is it working for you. Sometimes pressure can actually feel a little bit good, right? It can kind of move you into commitment and this fiery, I don’t know, action.
But I just wanted to get curious with you because it sounds like, obviously, based on what you’re telling me that it’s not working for you.
Kaitlynn: No, for right now that’s not working. Like I’m putting not great pressure on myself right now.
Lindsey: Okay, well, first of all, I just also want to celebrate you for leaving your nine to five job.
Kaitlynn: Thank you.
Lindsey: That’s freaking amazing and takes so much courage. So here’s my question, what did you think was going to change when you left your nine to five job?
Kaitlynn: And that’s such a good question because I’ve been pondering this a lot. I’m like, what did I think was going to be different and am just not doing the things that I thought I was going to be doing? And so for right now, I feel like I’m in this waiting period because typically I’m off in the summers. I worked at a school as a counselor so this is typically a time where I’m usually off.
Lindsey: You’re off.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, so it doesn’t feel out of the ordinary. And I think I’m going to get a different feeling when September rolls around and all my friends are going back to work and whatever. It’ll feel really good not to be doing that. But then I’ll be like, okay, now it’s game time.
Lindsey: Okay.
Kaitlynn: So right now I feel like, okay, it’s ticking down, we have a month left of my typical vacation or time off. So I’m still telling myself that it’s all good, but then I catch myself sometimes, I’m like, okay, you’ve really got to kick it up into gear.
Lindsey: Yeah.
Kaitlynn: And then I’m not. There’s no kicking. I’m not kicking it up.
Lindsey: So tell me how you feel when you have the thought, “Now it’s game time.” Like, what does that mean?
Kaitlynn: In this situation it gives me a little bit of relief. And then at some point in the future I’m going to kick it off, but right now it’s okay. It’s okay to be doing what I’m doing right now.
Lindsey: Okay.
Kaitlynn: But when I say it’s game time, for me, it’s just at a point in the future.
Lindsey: And what does it mean though? What does game time mean?
Kaitlynn: Yeah, I don’t know. Like hustling, I guess. Or like I need to be getting clients. I need to be doing something to make money. I need to be on my computer. Like, I just need to be doing something.
Lindsey: You need to be in your office just like working.
Kaitlynn: Yeah.
Lindsey: Yeah. And how does that feel?
Kaitlynn: Not fun. It feels unattractive. It doesn’t compel me to do what I really want to be doing. It feels tight, not great.
Lindsey: Yeah, it has like a – I only know this because my brain likes to do this too. It’s like, now we’re serious. But it has a seriousness to it.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, kind of rough.
Lindsey: And like a heaviness almost.
Kaitlynn: And I’ve also noticed myself, too, like, this summer I’m in between the two. So some days, like yesterday, I sat at my computer all day and I’m like, I need to do work. I need to create content. I need to do this course. I need to blah, blah, blah. And then today I’m like, okay, I have a couple things to do. I’m out of the house. I’m like this is a fun day, which I guess is a good balance. However, I’m not doing either 100%.
Lindsey: What I want to just show you based on what you’ve told me is it’s kind of this push/pull. There’s a difference between your days kind of evolving and being different based on loving, abundant decisions and that’s what you want to do, rather than this push/pull that shows up when you’re like it’s game time. We have to be serious, we need to be working.
Which actually, if you think about it, creates long term burnout. If people stay in that energy, that’s what makes it exhausting and then you need those breaks. So it kind of is giving that, like you have that push/pull which creates inconsistency in your actions and in your energy.
Kaitlynn: 100%, yeah. I would say that’s what’s happening right now.
Lindsey: And when you do take action, like when you are like, “Okay, I need to sit at my desk and I need to get to work,” what is the energy of those actions? Like, what does that typically look like?
Kaitlynn: Yeah, it’s not my best if it feels pressured and forced, rather than just like coming to me. And I have both, like both are happening all at once and I feel like maybe I’m being a little bit hard on myself that I’m not in that flow state constantly because that’s what I thought that it was going to be like leaving my nine to five.
Lindsey: Yeah.
Kaitlynn: So then I’m like, yeah, I just thought it was just going to be like, okay, all this money is going to be rolling in and I have all this time on my hands, where like I’m still doing the same thing that I was doing. I know you know that it’s summertime, so I guess I’ll get a better sense of what it will be like when I’m giving myself permission to get off and vacation. Yeah, but it’s like not my best stuff, it feels forced and pressured.
And I feel like it’s not magnetic. I am somebody that loves to have fun. I am a very confident person, so I think that I carry myself that way. But when it comes to being like, okay, I help other women with confidence, this isn’t what I want to be magnetizing, like stress and pressure at all. I feel like it’s counterintuitive for what I’m trying to do, you know?
Lindsey: Yeah, 100%. Okay, let me ask you this. Do you want to be working right now?
Kaitlynn: So my answer is yes and no. Sometimes I find work and creating content fun, so that doesn’t bother me.
Lindsey: Okay.
Kaitlynn: And, for me, I’m just like I would feel so much better or less pressured, I think, or less future stressed if I knew that I was having a ton of money coming in. So, for me, I’m like, yeah, this is like my runway, like I could be making money now and I’m still getting paid from my job. Like it feels safe right now, but I feel like in a month or so I’m going to be like, the well is dry.
Lindsey: Yeah. So here’s the thing, right? And this is totally common, obviously we know you’re using pressure to motivate your actions. But because of that, you’re also waiting till the “well runs dry.”
Kaitlynn: Yeah, you’re right.
Lindsey: Which creates inconsistent motivation. I even see this with people who are making hundreds of thousands of dollars in their business. They’ll have a streak where they make a lot of money and then they’re like, oh, okay, the pressure is off. They stop taking that kind of powerful, decided action and that consistent action, and then they start to run out. And then they’re like, oh shit.
Kaitlynn: Oh shit, yeah.
Lindsey: And it goes up and down and up and down.
Kaitlynn: Yeah.
Lindsey: So I’m curious, let’s just say you did have a ton of money coming in. Like your job was going to pay you forever, for the foreseeable future. Why would you want to take action on your business now?
Kaitlynn: Because there are a lot of elements about it that I love. I love connecting with women. I love helping women see their potential. There’s so much to it that I do love, whether there’s money involved or not. So even if it wasn’t pressure and like I needed to make money, I would still be doing what I’m doing.
Lindsey: Okay. Does that feel powerful enough or connected to your reason enough to move you?
Kaitlynn: I think with my hesitation, my answer is still no.
Lindsey: Yeah.
Kaitlynn: So what does this mean?
Lindsey: So what this means is none of this is a problem, right? We’re just bringing a lot of awareness to this. But whatever reason, like loving reason, like powerful reason that excites you, that’s going to make you want to take action no matter what, it’s not deep enough or meaningful enough to get your butt out of bed every day in the morning to be pumped to do this, whether or not you “need” money without the pressure.
And this is, again, like I said, super common. A lot of us are just addicted to pressure motivating us. It’s survival, right? So our bodies and brains are naturally used to being like, oh, wait, we’re going to run out of food. Okay, this is how we get ourselves to go out. Because it conserves energy too, right? We look, do we have enough food? We do. Okay, we can rest. Okay, wait, we don’t have enough food. Pressure, let’s get ourselves out there, fight or flight.
So it’s a very foundational human thing to operate this way.
Kaitlynn: Totally.
Lindsey: But, as you know, those survival emotions and processes of thinking are not going to help you live this mind-blowing life and create this mind-blowing business.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, which I totally get. And I understand that it’s actually a very great tool and we need it, but I’m like how can I get out of it? And I know that I’m in it.
Lindsey: Yeah, 100%. So let’s go here really quick and then I think it’s going to be something that you have to connect back to every single day. It doesn’t mean you’re working every single day, but connecting back to this. But my question is, why does this matter? If you won the lottery, you said you’d still be doing this work, but why?
Kaitlynn: I love when a woman can connect like an aha moment. I mean, I’m sure you can relate to this too. Like when you’re like, oh my God, that little thing right there, that’s going to change her forever. That’s going to make her better off. That’s going to help her feel more confident. That’s going to help her in her marriage. That’s going to help her be a better mom. Like, I love that part. And that’s amazing.
Lindsey: Yeah. And what happens if you don’t do that?
Kaitlynn: I don’t know. Like, I feel like I wouldn’t have a purpose. Like I wouldn’t be living my purpose. So that feels shitty.
Lindsey: Okay. What happens to those women if they don’t get your help? Those moms?
Kaitlynn: I feel like they will just be continuing on their path. Like continuing on doing what they’re doing. Or maybe they’ll sink a little deeper and hit a worse moment or a worse point that will help them pick themselves up. Or maybe they’re just not even going to be living their potential and maybe they’re not aware of it, they’re just fine with it.
Lindsey: Why is that important?
Kaitlynn: Because everybody should be living an amazing life that they’re so obsessed with. That’s like a deep-seated belief for me.
Lindsey: But why? You’re going to get annoyed, but I’m going to keep asking.
Kaitlynn: But why? Why is it so important? Because we only live once. Like this is it, this is all we’ve got and everybody should feel – Whether my idea of what’s fucking amazing is different from somebody else’s idea of what fucking amazing is, then like everybody deserves that, you know?
Lindsey: Why?
Kaitlynn: I don’t know, why not? I don’t know if I have an answer. Like, why does everybody deserve that?
Lindsey: Or why is this important to you, to help people?
Kaitlynn: Oh, why is it important to me? Because I’ve been on the other side of it and I know what it feels like to just be getting by or just thinking I’m good and thinking that something better is not something that I can have, or that’s not possible for me.
And I just, even if it could just help one person a year like even, to be like, oh my gosh, let me just open my eyes real quick and like I could have a better relationship or I could feel calmer, or I could be happier, or I could wear the clothes that I want to wear and feel really good. Like those little tweaks or those little shifts are everything I’m after. You know what I mean?
Lindsey: Yeah. How does that feel?
Kaitlynn: Like I have so much more to offer that I’m just not even tapping into when it comes to how I can help change other women’s lives.
Lindsey: Yeah. And I think the other thing is, you’re also not seeing that you’re already doing it.
Kaitlynn: Yeah. I think I lose sight of it sometimes. Like sometimes I’m like, wow. Like I saw a thing at Starbucks, and it was like the question of the day. They just put these silly little questions out. And last week it was like, what are you so proud of? And I was like, I’m so proud of myself. And then I was like, huh, because sometimes they don’t even see that.
Lindsey: Yeah.
Kaitlynn: It just took that little thing at Starbucks to really be like, wow, I’m so proud of myself. Yeah, I definitely lose sight of it sometimes and, obviously, it takes conversations like this or little signs from places to be like, oh, damn, I’m really doing a good job in life right now.
Lindsey: Yes.
Kaitlynn: Yeah. So even if not everything is where I thought it would be or what I wanted it to be right now, it’s still really so good. And I’m so thankful for that and I just need to live in that, you know?
Lindsey: Yes, I choked. I literally was coaching myself on this the other day. I’m like, our brains have amnesia. Literally.
Kaitlynn: For real, yeah.
Lindsey: It’s like they just forget. I can feel so connected to that, too, and then three days later I’ve just forgotten and I’m just skipping along my way, right?
Kaitlynn: Yeah, totally. Yeah, like I was saying, all it took was for me to see that little, like in a little whiteboard marker or an expo marker to be like, what are you so proud of this year? And I’m like, oh my God, I’m so fucking proud of myself. Look at all the stuff that I’ve done. And I’m just skipping away like, wow, I really am so proud of myself.
And I just, yeah, that was last week and here I am today like, things aren’t working out and I want to have more. I just forgot about all the amazing shit that I have going on, you know?
Lindsey: Yeah. And that’s what you help other women and moms do, right? Like feel proud of themselves?
Kaitlynn: Totally. Yeah, no, totally. It’s my favorite thing, starting off every call with a celebration. Like I’m working with a woman right now and she’s like killing it and she doesn’t even see it. I’m like, girlfriend, do you see everything that you’ve done? Like, you’ve far surpassed everything that you said that you set out for in the next six months when we started. And she’s like, oh yeah, wow.
So I’m like, oh, this just feels so good to be helping other women do that. And, of course, we all know what we could be doing or what we “should” be doing, in air quotes, and we’re not taking action on it. And then you just need someone to help hold you accountable, to help see your potential, to hold that belief for you. And it just makes, I don’t know, it just makes it so much easier when someone is there to help show you how amazing you are, I guess.
Lindsey: And that is what you do for people. So here’s my question. Two things. One, what is something you can do or implement or create for yourself to connect yourself back to this?
Kaitlynn: I feel like I just need a little something like on my car, maybe on my background on my phone, rather than having it be a picture of my husband and I or something. Just something that is going to put me back into this, oh shit, I’m doing amazing. Not in a cocky way and not in an airy way. I deeply am so proud of myself that I just need to connect back with this all the time every single day. Like look with the fuck you’ve done, Kaitlynn.
So like something as simple as a post-it note on my car or by my mirror where I brush my teeth every day, something that I’m going to see every day and just see and feel it. That’s like one tiny little thing that I could do that, of course, I could have thought of that on my own but didn’t.
Lindsey: Yeah, okay. I’m going to give you homework or a suggestion too.
Kaitlynn: Okay, love that.
Lindsey: So how do you feel about spending time journaling or writing on what happens to the women if you don’t introduce them to this, if you don’t point out how proud they can be of themselves, if you don’t help them do that?
Kaitlynn: Yeah. Well I love writing and I love journaling, so that sounds like something totally I would do and I need to do. Did you see the Barbie movie?
Lindsey: I haven’t yet.
Kaitlynn: You must.
Lindsey: I know I cannot wait. I cannot wait. I’m going to need to block a whole day after it to work because I’m going to be like, ahh, we’ve got to change the world from what I’ve heard.
Kaitlynn: Yes, Lindsey, I’m telling you go. Run, like go run. Like that’s really what this is all about, helping other women see their potential just as they are right now. Like you don’t need to do anything different. You don’t need to add anything, you don’t need to lose anything. Like just as you are right now, just see it. And, yeah, I need to be writing more about what would happen to the women if Barbie never went back, like whatever, I’m not going to spoil it.
But yeah, what would happen to all the women if I stopped doing what I was doing. I never would want that to happen. I’m like, no, that’s not a world I want to live in. Even if it was just like two people, you know what I mean?
Lindsey: Yeah.
Kaitlynn: Okay.
Lindsey: And here’s my next question to leave you with. What would it look like to decide you’re going to get what you want, no matter what? Because right now you want it. You want it really bad, right? But you haven’t decided, the way that you decided I’m quitting my job.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, I think I’m confusing – Not confusing, I’m clumping the two together. See, for me, for the longest time, as you know, it was like when I quit my job, then it’s like I made it. And so I need to separate the two. Like, okay, cool. You did one. You did the thing and now, what’s next? And so for me I’m like, boop, done. Like, okay, did it. But I really haven’t. Like I haven’t taken the next step after that.
Like, this is not me living in my full potential. Like that was step 1A. Good insight. Good insight. I forget what your initial thing was.
Lindsey: No, that’s okay. I said what would it look like for you to decide that you’re going to sign clients, help these women no matter what, like right now?
Kaitlynn: That’s right. Yeah. I was like, I’ve already decided, but maybe I really haven’t already decided.
Lindsey: You haven’t yet, otherwise you would have the result.
Kaitlynn: I know. That feels like a hard question.
Lindsey: Let me frame it a little bit differently.
Kaitlynn: Okay.
Lindsey: When you decided to leave your job, why did you feel like you could decide that? Or how did you just decide that?
Kaitlynn: Well, there were a lot of factors, but it was just like this is no longer feeling good for me. And I am not willing to have things in my life as big as my job that are misaligned with who I am as a person, what my values are. So it made it easy for me to be like this is no longer a match.
Lindsey: But you felt that for a while.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, for a while.
Lindsey: What took you from that to actually deciding?
Kaitlynn: I just think that I was like, if it’s not now then it’s never and I just need to take the leap and trust myself. And that was really it. And I was like it’s now or never, really, or I can continue living – So I feel like I need to be the example. If this is what I’m teaching women how to do, if this is what I’m all about, then fucking be about it.
Lindsey: What would it look like next to be about it?
Kaitlynn: Putting it out there more, I guess, and just making offers. If I need to do things a little bit differently in my business, do it. I’ve been thinking about, like I am in the middle of creating a course, maybe I need to do that, sell that. Like I just need to maybe open my mind a little bit more to other ways of making income and then I feel like I won’t feel so much pressure to be just getting clients. Do you know what I mean?
Lindsey: Well, but I think – And it doesn’t have to be a problem, but I think you’re trying to change the C, the circumstance, a little bit again. Like you can decide and sign as many one on one clients as you want. What I want to offer is that, to me, the difference was that you felt like everything was in your power with your job to leave. Like you tell your boss.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, my husband.
Lindsey: And then you sign the paperwork and you leave. And I think part of you, my guess would be, and I’m just making some assumptions here but I’ve coached you before. It would be that you’re not feeling like you have that kind of power over creating the result that you want.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, maybe part of it that I’m like, yeah, that could be it. It doesn’t feel deeply like, yes, that’s what’s happening. But I mean, I feel like probably under the surface that’s what’s happening, is that I’m dependent on other people rather than me creating the result for myself.
Lindsey: Yeah. Like if you could just decide today that you’re going to – What’s your goal? Like, give me an example.
Kaitlynn: I would like to just be making like two clients a month every month.
Lindsey: Okay, two clients a month.
Kaitlynn: That would be like giving me 10k. Yeah.
Lindsey: Okay. So what keeps you from thinking like, decided, done, I’m signing two clients this month?
Kaitlynn: I don’t know if anything keeps me from it because I really go on and I’m like, yeah, it’s happening. I do think that it is happening, so I don’t know.
Lindsey: Well part of you doesn’t, though.
Kaitlynn: I mean, maybe there is. Yeah, I don’t know. Then I always feel like I’ve always struggled. I’m like, am I living in delusion? Because every month I’m like, yeah, that’s happening. Like it’s happening right now.
Lindsey: I think that there’s a difference – I love delusion. I think delusion is magical.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, it could be helpful.
Lindsey: But I do know you because you’ve been in my masterminds before and I know, you kind of trick yourself a little bit sometimes. And it’s like you come to the call thinking, I’m stressed and I – What did you say exactly? Like, I’m not taking action. I’m not getting the result that I want. And then you’re like, but I believe it’s happening.
Kaitlynn: Yeah.
Lindsey: But you don’t. And I think that little gap is what’s keeping you from that. It’s like I think there’s a difference between hope and deciding.
Kaitlynn: Yeah. Totally.
Lindsey: I think you’re hopeful. I think you’re like, oh, it’s totally possible. But you haven’t decided that it’s happening the way you decide to go pick your two girls up from school.
Kaitlynn: I think you’re right, Lindsey. I think you’re right. So when I think about what I need to do to decide, like it’s just, okay. Like, I can decide on this call right now. Like I can just decide it.
Lindsey: Yeah. Well, let’s use that as an example. If your girls are at school, I know they’re on summer right now, but you just make the simple decision to go pick them up from school, right? What makes that so simple?
Kaitlynn: Well, if I don’t, who’s going to get them? I know that I have to just because I’m their mom and I have to go get them.
Lindsey: You’re committed to them.
Kaitlynn: It’s just like, yeah, I’m just committed. Yeah, of course. It’s like a no-brainer.
Lindsey: And let me ask you this, if there was a flood, a tornado, like something happening that was getting in the way of you getting them, if your car broke down on the side of the road, is there anything that would keep you from getting them?
Kaitlynn: No, of course, I would figure it out or have someone help me out. Yeah.
Lindsey: Okay. What’s different about that versus like, I am making 10k this month and signing two clients?
Kaitlynn: I think my brain is like, yes, but you have to have those other people. Part of it is the other people committing too.
Lindsey: Yeah. So there’s part of it that you don’t feel like you have power over.
Kaitlynn: Okay. Yeah, you’re right.
Lindsey: That’s the little piece. And this is so common. This is literally what I have to coach myself on at every level and coach all my clients on, for example, in business, but with any result that they’re trying to create, right?
Kaitlynn: Totally, yes. And it’s so funny, because my sister-in-law, I was talking to her and she loves interior design and she started her own business. And I’m like, oh, you should offer that. Like, I had so many things to offer her. And she’s like, yeah, but not everybody likes interior design. I’m like, those aren’t your people. This is how you do it, like you don’t market to – Like I had so much to offer her, but I need to be doing the same thing for myself.
Lindsey: Yeah, you’re right, you don’t have control over other people. Just like you don’t have control of the weather when you go to get your girls. You don’t have control of if a car bumps you and or you drive over a nail. But you don’t even think about that, right?
Kaitlynn: No.
Lindsey: Because you’re like, it doesn’t matter. Even if all those things happen, I am getting them. And that’s the difference, is so often we look at other people as the thing in our way. We’re like, well, if they say no, I can’t hit my goal. But it’s like, no, someone saying no is running over a nail. Someone saying no is the weather being bad. You don’t just go like, oh, the weather is bad. Sorry, girls, you’re stuck at school.
Kaitlynn: Figure it out. Yeah.
Lindsey: Right? Because you’re like, oh, okay, we’re going to find another way. We’re going to find another way. We’re going to find another way. We’re going to find another way until you get the result you want. You do not stop.
Kaitlynn: So wouldn’t that be changing the circumstances though?
Lindsey: What do you mean?
Kaitlynn: If I was like, oh, I need to find another way and another way to get two clients.
Lindsey: This can be tricky. Changing the circumstance isn’t a problem. You can also look at it as changing the action. The thing that you always want to look at is why you’re doing it. Are you taking action on this? Are you changing what you’re doing because you are thinking it’s not working? Or because you think that your feelings are based on that circumstance or changing that thing? Or is it because you’re so committed to getting what you want?
Kaitlynn: That you’re going after it however, yeah.
Lindsey: Yes.
Kaitlynn: Okay, that makes sense.
Lindsey: Two very different things that create very different outcomes. And for those of you listening, just so you know, obviously we’re kind of speaking coach language a little bit. But a lot of times we try to change our circumstances in an effort to try to change how we feel.
And this is why a lot of people get stuck just changing boyfriends, changing jobs, changing things, and they end up feeling the same way because they haven’t done the work. They’re not changing it for a reason that’s really going to help them create what they want. So that’s kind of what we’re talking about here.
But yeah, how would it feel to have that be like, okay, it doesn’t matter. Everyone who says no, like, find another way? And I don’t necessarily mean like another offer.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, I get what you’re saying.
Lindsey: I mean another way to connect with them. Another person, another post, another event that you go to. I’m willing to bet – Let me ask you this, Kaitlynn, because I know you also teach barre classes, right?
Kaitlynn: Uh-huh.
Lindsey: I’m willing to bet there are probably five women right now in your world who listen to your podcast, who learn from you, who come to your classes that you think would be the best freaking clients ever. Am I wrong?
Kaitlynn: You’re not wrong. No, you’re right.
Lindsey; That you’re like I know I can help them.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, totally.
Lindsey: Have you told them that?
Kaitlynn: No. No, and I’m like, why won’t I? I guess just like, obviously, fear of rejection or putting myself out there or people having thoughts of me selling. Like, I just have all kinds of drama about that.
Lindsey: That’s only because you’re focused, your brain is focused on taking something from them, rather than you’re literally giving them an opportunity.
Kaitlynn: Yeah. No, you’re right.
Lindsey: I’ll give you a great example. Actually, this current mastermind that I’m running, one of the girls in there, I knew I could help her. And I don’t even know if she was considering the mastermind, but I reached out. I don’t do that a lot, but it has to come from that like, I can help you. Let me help you. I think you need to be in this room.
I reached out to her and I was like, I don’t even know if you’re interested in this, but I know I can help you with what you’re struggling with and I at least want to have a conversation about it. And she got on –
Kaitlynn: I have one person in particular, like we’re texting right now.
Lindsey: Yeah. And she was like, okay, right? The wrong person would be like, whoa, yuck, no. But if your heart is truly in the right place, and it’s okay, if it’s not sometimes. Like you’re going to have to get messy, you’re going to have to feel that uncomfortableness. Like this is the cost of your dreams. But they can say no. They can get on a call with you and you can tell them the price and they can be like, whoa, no, I’m not doing that. But at least you threw them the lifeline. At least you told them that you can help them.
Kaitlynn: Yeah. No, you’re totally right. And just as I was saying to my friend, I’m like your people will be, like you’ll just be a magnet to the people that value what you’re doing. I’m like, I need to take my own advice.
Lindsey: One last thing. I know I’ve given you a lot, but I just have one other idea. So I don’t want to overwhelm you with things, but the only thing that we’ve really given in terms of homework was like what’s the cost to them not having you. The other thing is what would it look like if you blocked one or two hours in your calendar a day or whatever it is you want to work, it doesn’t even have to be every day. But those two hours are you fighting in a powerful way to sign clients. Like for the full two hours.
So many people think it takes so much time, you need to do all these things, right? But imagine if you’re like, timer for two hours, I’m doing anything and everything in my power to find a way to sign clients today. I’m going to connect with people. I’m going to reach out to them. I’m going to offer free coaching on my Instagram. I’m going to ask my barre place if I could do a free workshop.
Kaitlynn: Yeah, no, I like that idea. And just putting the hard stamp on it like, okay, two hours on Monday, Wednesday, Friday, whatever it is.
Lindsey: Yeah.
Kaitlynn: Because otherwise I’m sitting there for like, oh my God, because I can’t for six hours and I’m like sign, get clients, think of content. I’m just like, working. In my brain I’m working, but I’m not. Like oftentimes I’ll end up scrolling social media and then wasting time. I know, that’s what I’m doing, and I don’t want to be doing that. And I could use my time by just like, yep, two hours today. Like every Wednesday morning I need to just, yeah, create that in my schedule.
Lindsey I’m signing clients, it’s done.
Kaitlynn: Yeah. Yeah, I like that. That’s a good takeaway, for sure.
Lindsey: Do you believe there’s any way that you wouldn’t sign clients if you showed up like that?
Kaitlynn: No, I think that would actually be more powerful than what I’m doing right now.
Lindsey: Yeah.
Kaitlynn: Totally. And way less time. Way less time.
Lindsey: Yes, so good. I love it. Well, thank you so much, Kaitlynn. I’m super excited to hear how it goes.
Kaitlynn: Thank you so much, Lindsey. Every time I get to connect with you I’m so excited. Your brain is so valuable and I love everything you’re about.
Lindsey: Thank you so much. Well, the good news, I love coaching you. You are so great, like you’re so coachable. I love coaching you in the life membership, all the things. But the good thing is I’m pretty sure this episode will definitely be out on one of them, so you’ll be able to listen to it over and over again to remind yourself even better.
Kaitlynn: Yay, perfect. Yay! Thank you.
Lindsey: You’re welcome. All right, awesome. I’ll talk to you soon.
Kaitlynn: All right. Bye, Lindsey. Thank you.
Lindsey: Bye, Kaitlynn. See ya.
If you want to call in to The Life Coach Hotline, go to https://lindseymango coaching.com/lifecoachhotline. Talk to you soon. Bye.
