Lindsey: Hi, welcome to The Life Coach Hotline. This is Lindsey Mango, your life coach. How can I help you?
Hi guys, welcome to the Coach the Experts podcast series featured on The Life Coach Hotline podcast. I want you to imagine that you get to be a fly on the wall for the coaches, the mentors, the leaders that you admire, to hear what their mind offers. The drama they have, the limits they have, the things that they need coaching on, that’s what this series is all about.
I would say maybe a little over a year ago, I can’t remember exactly, but I put a podcast episode out on my former podcast where my husband coached me. And I will say that was one of the most profound episodes and one of the episodes that got the most feedback, the most downloads, the most so many things from people.
And I spent a lot of time thinking about why and here’s what I realized. So often we put the people we admire on a pedestal. We don’t think that they have the same fears, the same limitations, the same thoughts, the same drama that we have.
And when we do that, when we put them on this pedestal, what we do is we make ourselves wrong for the fear, for the drama, for the discomfort, for the limitations we put on ourselves. And we expect that those things have to be eliminated completely and almost like we have to have the perfect mindset and the perfect approach in order to create the success and the life that we want.
By so many people listening to the episode where I’m being coached and by you listening to this series where I’m also going to have one where I’m being coached on who knows what, I haven’t even decided yet, you are going to realize that the people you admire and the results that they have and the success they have created have the exact same minds you do.
And you’re going to hear how they shift through some of their biggest blocks, some of their most vulnerable things live, to where you can see that even though you have some of the exact same thought processes as they have, that you can shift yourself. You can have a breakthrough and you can still create successful results alongside having all of the very human fears, doubts and discomforts that all of us have.
No one is unique. The reason why people have success and the people you admire have created the results that they have isn’t because they don’t have the same fear, drama and doubt that you have. It’s just what they choose to do with it that matters. And that’s what this series is going to offer you.
So buckle up, you are getting, I feel like, something that no one ever shares, which is the inner workings of the mentors and leaders that you follow, and what a coaching call for them looks like. And it’s going to offer you breakthroughs. It’s going to offer you the possibility of the success and the life that they have because you’re just like them.
And it is going to give you an opportunity to take what they learn and have transformation in real-time. It doesn’t matter what we’re specifically talking about, you can apply it to anything in your life, and it is going to change you. It changed me just by coaching these experts.
So without further ado, if I haven’t hyped it up enough, welcome to the series. I’m going to be coaching an expert, a leader, a mentor, a coach that you probably know. And if you don’t, you need to go follow them. And you’re going to hear tears of vulnerability, breakthroughs in real-time and you are going to walk away changed forever. So let’s dive in, welcome to the series.
Hi, guys. Welcome back to another Life Coach Hotline series, I don’t even know what I’m going to call this when this comes out. But like I said on some of the previous episodes, I wanted to do a series specific to me coaching people, and there’s also going to be one with me being coached, that we admire, that we look up to, that we follow along with.
So I picked people personally that I admire and that I love and that I think are doing really amazing things. Those people are also people that I think are admired in different industries and in the social media world and all of that.
So that was kind of my vision for this because I find that when we recognize that the people we admire and follow along and watch their success and all of that have the same brains that we have, I think it makes their results or the version that we want for ourselves even more accessible because it’s not like we don’t have fear or we don’t have the same limitations and beliefs that everyone else does. We all have the same human brain.
So anyway, I say all that to say I want to introduce Ashley Gordon and bring her onto the episode to be coached. And I’m actually just going to let her – This is super laid back, I’m going to let her kind of like introduce herself and then we’ll jump into what she wants coaching on.
So hi, Ashley. I’m so excited to have you.
Ashley: Hi, I’m so excited to be here. Thank you. Thank you for coaching me.
Lindsey: You’re welcome. I am so pumped. So why don’t you just tell them what you do and a little bit of your backstory and then we can coach on what you want to get coaching on.
Ashley: Amazing. I am the creator of a coaching certification, it’s called the Quantum Coaching Academy. And we really train the next generation of world class coaches and leaders in facilitation, coaching, space holding inside of our six month plus certification. We have eight different certifications that we help you embody and we are really passionate about the ripple effect, right? The ripple effect of what’s possible when we train these coaches and they go out into the world and start changing lives.
And so, yeah, I have a podcast called Badass Manifester Podcast. I’ve been in this industry for quite some time, since 2018 was my first full year starting as a spiritual manifestation life coach. And I scaled my business very quickly, realizing that it wasn’t my marketing that was really the thing, it was just the ability to get results with clients that was attracting more people to me. And so it just kind of grew naturally.
And then in 2019 is when I got the divine download for the Quantum Coaching Academy, it was given to me by the angels above and was like, you’re creating a coaching certification.
Lindsey: So good.
Ashley: I was like, oh, no I’m not. So that’s the long and short of it. I’m so passionate about helping people really master their craft and create change. That’s why I love what you do, because I listen to the show and I hear the impact that you have on people and you’re a master at your craft and I admire that because I feel like we need more of that in this industry.
And the fact that you’re being so real and so vulnerable to just share your gifts this way is just, it’s really incredible.
Lindsey: Aw, thank you, Ashley. That makes me a little teary-eyed.
Ashley: I know, I’m getting teary-eyed.
Lindsey: Also, for those listening, Ashley and I are both new – I’m like, I’m going to be a new mom until my daughter’s 16, I think. But we’re both new moms, so we just kind of connect in that way. But thank you so much, Ashley. I really appreciate that.
Ashley: I left that whole part out. Yeah, I’m a mom. I’m just like, this is what I do.
Lindsey: She is a mom. Her son is adorable. She does it all. It’s awesome. Before we jump in, I just want to also celebrate you. I can tell you just care so deeply about what you do and also just your willingness to be coached because I think not everyone would be willing to open their mind up to the world to have them hear it.
So I just think that’s really cool and says a lot about you and your vulnerability and all of that.
Ashley: Thank you. Thank you, thank you.
Lindsey: You’re welcome. All right, so what do you want coaching on?
Ashley: So right now I am in the middle of a quantum leap, like we’re just mid quantum leap right now in the business. And for so long I felt like I was plateauing. We were having the same launches over and over again, pretty much for the last, I would say a couple of years. And beautiful launches, multi six-figure launches. And I’m like, well, what is in my way of getting me to this next level?
And I did a lot of digging and I realized like, yeah, the person I’m waiting for is me. I was like waiting for someone to rescue me. And I resonated so much with some of your content where you were like, when you’re waiting for someone to give you that opportunity, you have to create it for yourself. Like you have no idea how that landed with me.
And I was in this breathwork ceremony and I was like, wow, I’m the one. I’m the one to give it to myself. It was really profound.
Lindsey: So cool.
Ashley: And the energetics of that shifted me into a completely different reality, where we are now quantum leaping. I’m cusping right now a million dollar launch.
Lindsey: Ashley, oh my God, that’s amazing.
Ashley: It’s insane. It’s insane. So my nervous system is freaking out a little bit and I have fear coming up. I’m future tripping, like what could go wrong? Or what if we can’t do it as well as we’ve done it the past seven cohorts? This is going to be like the infinity cohort, it’s number eight. Just so many what ifs are running through my mind and I’m just a little nervous.
Lindsey: Yeah. So good.
Ashley: Yeah.
Lindsey: That is amazing.
Ashley: Thank you.
Lindsey: And also so scary.
Ashley: Yeah, it’s like, whoa, I’ve wanted this for so long. I’ve been manifesting this for so long. And it’s like, it’s all here and I’m almost having trouble feeling it.
Lindsey: Yeah. Okay, that’s so good because there were two places I wanted to go. One of them being it feels like this is your – It’s kind of like Big Leap-ish if you’ve read that book, but I was going to say this feels like your resistance to feeling good.
Ashley: Which is so weird for me.
Lindsey: Yeah. Like, how does that land with you? Why do you feel like you’re resisting the just amazingness of this and feeling it?
Ashley: It’s almost like a fear of, well, what if I can’t recreate this again? And don’t get too excited because it might not last, which is like not – I guess I do have that in other places in my life too. But yeah, I think that’s what it is.
Lindsey: So good. I think that the fact that this is showing up just says a couple things, that you’re creating this result means you’ve never been more prepared for it, which is so cool. Like you’ve made the shift to be here. And I think it’s fun to think that the fact that it’s showing up means that you’re exactly where you need to be.
Ashley: That’s a really good reframe. The fact that it’s showing up is I’ve never been more prepared to be here, which does feel true. And I’m like, wait, am I as prepared as I think I am?
Lindsey: Well, I was going to say I think that the fact that piece is also showing up means that you are, because it’s kind of like the idea of if my brain ever offers like, who are you to do that? I’m always like, oh, that means I am on the right track. Because my brain wouldn’t offer that information or I wouldn’t even be in that situation if I wasn’t on the right track or in the right spot.
Ashley: Yes, that feels true.
Lindsey: Okay. So here’s my other question. So you were saying what if I can’t recreate this or what if it doesn’t last? I just want to go there for a second. Like, okay, so what if you can’t recreate it? What if it doesn’t last? Then what does that mean?
Ashley: It means that I’ll be stuck at another plateau.
Lindsey: And what does that mean?
Ashley: It means that it’s not sustainable. Like that this level of success isn’t necessarily sustainable for me.
Lindsey: Okay. And what will that mean?
Ashley: That I’m a failure. I mean, ooh, that I’m not really who I think I am. Does that even make sense?
Lindsey: I think what matters is – I mean, yes, but what does that mean to you?
Ashley: Yeah, it’s almost like my success and ability to recreate it is directly related to my worthiness.
Lindsey: Which I’m guessing when you were in that plateau, did that come up a lot?
Ashley: It’s strange because when it comes to I’m worthy of this, I’m like, I’ve worked through this so many times. Like I don’t give it the attention that it really needs anymore because I just assume that I’ve already gone there so much, but it does. It’s still coming up.
Lindsey: And worthy of what?
Ashley: So many things. Worthy of impacting the people that I want to impact. Worthy of making a certain amount of money. Worthy of, I think, being seen on like a bigger scale. That’s pretty scary to me.
Lindsey: What’s so interesting to me, the thing that’s coming up is it’s like there are feelings associated with impacting, making the amount of money you want to make and being seen on a bigger scale that it’s like you don’t give yourself full permission to feel unless you have the result. Does that feel true?
Ashley: I would say yes and no, where I feel like I feel those feelings before I have the result in order to create the result. Like in my manifestation process and practice I’m feeling into that reality. And now that it’s here, it’s almost like I’m afraid to feel it fully because what if it just goes away?
Lindsey: Yeah, but you’re forgetting how powerful you are.
Ashley: Yeah.
Lindsey: You’re in charge of feeling those feelings. And right now you’ve forgotten that you can feel them, no matter the outcome. Like if this outcome is here or not, you still get to have the feelings.
Ashley: Yep, that’s so cool.
Lindsey: Which is so interesting, right? Because your brain, and I know you’re tracking this, but I just want it for listeners too. But your brain is like, we can’t feel this because what if it goes away? When in reality, it’s like you are the one in charge of the feeling no matter what. So it’s like you can decide whether it goes away or not.
Ashley: Wow. And I felt this feeling of success before it was even here. So it’s just like –
Lindsey: Yes.
Ashley: Wow, that’s good.
Lindsey: Mm-hmm. And I think the other thing is that while you have been practicing feeling the feelings, it sounds like there are some feelings associated with the plateau.
Ashley: Yeah.
Lindsey: Yeah, like you don’t want to go back to that. I can totally relate to that, too.
Ashley: Yeah.
Lindsey: But what’s interesting is you were just saying, I’m afraid this success isn’t sustainable. But at some point the “plateau” you were at, I’m guessing, was a success that you couldn’t have dreamed of at some point and you were sustaining it. But you called it a plateau.
Ashley: Oh shit, Lindsey. Oh my gosh. Everyone let that sink in.
Lindsey: I’ll give you a second.
Ashley: Because that, I mean, I’m like thinking meta because I’m thinking about the people listening as well because anyone can relate to that. Like, that’s so true. I decided it was a plateau.
Lindsey: Yep.
Ashley: But you’re right.
Lindsey: You were sustaining success.
Ashley: I was sustaining success. And I’m sure when this launch repeats itself –
Lindsey: I know, I was just thinking that.
Ashley: I’ll call it a plateau.
Lindsey: And I’m like, we’re going to be here on the call and I’m going to be like, Ashley, let me rewind and play this back for you again.
Ashley: Oh my God. I now understand why we’re recording this, it’s for my future self.
Lindsey: Exactly.
Ashley: Wow. I’m smiling.
Lindsey: Good. So huge, because I also just thought like, what if that was the part of you also creating the safety and the emotion, like feelings and all that you needed to get here? So like it was all very necessary, like you were sustaining that success, you were like laying the foundation internally for this. And it was all so, so necessary to the process.
Ashley: Oh, it’s so true. I mean, I believe that 100%, I do. I do, I do. Yeah, the safety piece, because I always would say to myself, imagine waking up tomorrow and being Tony Robbins. There’s no way I would be able to feel safe as him, like with all those people and holding that big of space, you know? In my head I can imagine it, but it’s not realistic for my system. You know what I mean?
Lindsey: Mm-hmm.
Ashley: So it’s kind of the same thing. And I’ve been saying to myself over the last couple of years like, your success has been very linear. It’s very like we grow a little bit every single year, which is great. And it’s very realistic in a way. And I kept saying to myself, like, no, I’m always like how far can I take manifestation? How far can I take this life? How far can I take my expression and experience? Like let’s push the limits, right? Like I want a quantum leap.
So like, universe, show me a quantum leap. And I mean, yeah, it’s here. I was able to sustain this by being able to cultivate that safety and knowing what we do and how well we do it and having those smaller containers to do it in, to be able to facilitate at the next level.
Lindsey: Yeah. It’s kind of like, I think you can relate to this because you had a baby, right? I was just thinking it’s kind of like being pregnant, right? That almost feels like the portal into motherhood, you know?
Ashley: Yeah.
Lindsey: It’s like imagine if you just got pregnant and the next day they’re like, here’s a newborn, right? Rather than like the whole process of it is like there’s certain things you can and can’t do when you’re pregnant. And that, I feel like, is like this portal into motherhood.
Ashley: Right, you’re preparing.
Lindsey: Yeah, and imagine if you were to shorten that process or call that a plateau.
Ashley: Oh my God, yes.
Lindsey: How does that feel?
Ashley: It feels really interesting and good to look at it this way and examine it in this way and hear you give it back to me like this. It’s really different than I’ve thought about it at all. I’m like, well, I don’t know, maybe I wasn’t even in a plateau. I wasn’t actually.
Lindsey: Yeah. Okay, that is mind boggling.
Ashley: It wasn’t, it was preparation for this.
Lindsey: And you get to relish in this because you’ve never been more prepared.
Ashley: Yeah. And then the other layer to that is like holding a bigger space for more people. There’s more opportunity for just – What am I looking for here?
Lindsey: Scrutiny?
Ashley: Yeah, thank you. Yeah, and that freaks me out, too.
Lindsey: Well, that’s perfect because that’s where I was going to go next with it. I think that you can also see that as like you’ve never been more prepared for that either.
Ashley: That is true.
Lindsey: Like it still might suck if it happens, right?
Ashley: Sure.
Lindsey: And be super uncomfortable. But how does it feel to be like I’ve just never been more prepared for that?
Ashley: It feels a little bit safer in my body to just be like, yeah, I’m prepared for whatever comes my way. And this could all be my own projection, right? Like it might not even happen.
Lindsey: Yeah, so true. And I think it’s just also sometimes like you can feel more free when you’re like, worst case scenario, I’ll be okay.
Ashley: Right. Right. Yeah, worst case scenario, I will be okay.
Lindsey: Does that feel true?
Ashley: Yeah, it does. It happened once. The second round we ever ran the program we had some really strong feedback, some really strong characters in there and it strengthened the program immensely. It strengthened me immensely. It plugged a lot of holes that we had in our content and in our processes, in our systems, in our preframes, our communication as facilitators. And yeah, it ultimately made me so strong.
Lindsey: That’s so good.
Ashley: So there might be a little PTSD from that, too.
Lindsey: Totally. That’s hard.
Ashley: Yeah.
Lindsey: Yeah, I think we’ve all been there at some point.
Ashley: Right. Like people don’t realize, you want to start a coaching business, well, prepare. Yeah, I say this all the time to my students and our coaches, it’s like being a leader is not for the faint of heart. It’s a lot. It’s a big responsibility. It’s not always about everybody liking you and looking good all the time.
Lindsey: Yeah, that’s so true.
Ashley: It’s like it’s heavy. It’s like, I don’t know. It’s just really I don’t have a choice though, my soul chose this. So I’m like all right, we’re here, let’s go. I’m the vessel. It’s not even about me. It really is like an ego death.
Lindsey: Totally. Like this isn’t even about me.
Ashley: Right.
Lindsey: This is like my destiny. Like I totally – You know what’s so interesting? I have kind of similar kind of – but sometimes I’m like, why am I like this? I’m like, why do I always have to be having to do the uncomfortable things and pushing? But I’m like, I have that same thought. I’m like, this is just written in my soul, in my DNA. I can’t not be this.
Ashley: Right, we don’t have a choice. We literally don’t have a choice. I daydream sometimes about just being a stay at home mom and having my only responsibilities are just laundry and shit.
Lindsey: No one coming at you on the internet, yeah.
Ashley: Yeah, exactly.
Lindsey: We’re probably scaring some people right now, though, as we talk.
Ashley: But yeah, there’s always that fear. A lot of people want to cancel your ass out there.
Lindsey: I think also the example you used about how this made your program stronger and you stronger, I think it’s like you get to see anybody that comes forth that way as just little universal assignments for the preparation of the next plateau. No, I’m kidding.
Ashley: Oh, that’s so true. I mean, that is life, too, right? Like any triggers, anything that is showing up, it’s all to help you get to be more prepared in your life, right?
Lindsey: So true.
Ashley: Yeah, it’s all to help fulfill the vision.
Lindsey: All of it
Ashley: Mm-hmm.
Lindsey: Yeah. Well, and I think what’s so funny, too, and interesting about this is it’s like you have to be willing to have those couple people for those thousands. Like I was just thinking about motherhood, too, and I think you’ll be able to relate to this. It’s like Eva’s been sleeping like crap this week and I know you’ve had those experiences.
Ashley: Oh, I’m having the same week.
Lindsey: Oh, well, it’s like a full moon or something. I’m like, what is actually happening? But it’s kind of like that. It’s like, obviously, those are hard and all of that, but you would never trade. You’re like, if this comes with that, I will never trade three days of terrible sleep, a week, a month of terrible sleep for the moment where I get to see my daughter see the moon for the first time.
And I think that’s the beauty of having this vision in what you’re creating. It’s like signing up for that, knowing the other side of the coin is like the millions of people that get to be helped because of the work you’re doing with your coaches.
Ashley: Yes, yes, yes. That just shifted me in a really big way.
Lindsey: Good.
Ashley: Yeah, I don’t have to hold all this resistance of like, well, what if? Like all that energy is just, it’s draining me, that I don’t need.
Lindsey: And keeping you from celebrating the thing you have worked so hard to create.
Ashley: Yes, it is. It is. That’s the thing that’s keeping me from celebrating. That’s the thing that’s like, yeah, it’s blocking me.
Lindsey: Okay, so now how are you going to go celebrate what’s happening?
Ashley: Oh, I’m going to give myself like an hour, at least, of just alone time to walk on the beach in the freezing cold and just dance with my headphones in and just feel the sun on my face and enjoy this feeling. Like really soak it in. Like the beach is my place to do that, for sure.
Lindsey: Oh, I feel teary eyed thinking about it.
Ashley: I’ll send you a video from the beach of me just having this moment with myself.
Lindsey: Seriously, please do. Like I just literally could see it so clearly. I’m so excited for you. Thank you so much for this.
Ashley: Thank you.
Lindsey: I know it’s going to be so impactful for people.
Ashley: Thank you so much for holding such a safe space and letting me explore this and just offering this beautiful coaching.
Lindsey: You are so welcome. I can’t wait to watch. It’s so fun because it’s like even though no one can ever know, right? It’s never like I’ve followed you and knew this was happening, by any means. But I think it’s going to be fun to see what shifts in you, like even in how it translates.
Ashley: Yes. Yes, and I would love your feedback as you follow along with that.
Lindsey: Yeah, I will, for sure. So good. Well, thank you so much, Ashley. I am so grateful and I can’t wait to share this episode. And I cannot wait to see you continue to create such amazing impact and success and all of that.
Ashley: Thank you so much.
Lindsey: And if any of you try to cancel her, I’ll come after you. I’m just kidding.
Ashley: Only love on our side of the Internet over there.
Lindsey: True. Awesome. So good. Well, thank you so much. And I will talk to you soon.
If you want to call in to The Life Coach Hotline, go to https://lindseymango coaching.com/lifecoachhotline. Talk to you soon. Bye.