Ep #54: Disempowered Trust vs. Empowered Belief

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Something I’m always emphasizing is the importance of cultivating belief. Belief is the foundation of absolutely everything, and without it being rock-solid in your business, everything else you build on top of it will crumble to the ground.

To show you exactly how powerful belief is, I’m introducing you to a concept I call disempowered trust versus empowered belief. One of the first things I help all my students with is believing wholeheartedly that they can get the results they want, but belief can be sneaky. I see so many women thinking they’re in belief when they’re not, so it’s time to identify if you might be in the same boat.

Listen in this week as I show you what it means to be in disempowered trust versus empowered belief. The shift between these two energies is subtle, but the difference in results they produce is huge, so I’m guiding you through where you might be right now and showing you how to harness that energy to start your coaching business and sign clients.

If you’re ready to take this work deeper and create your own coaching business, join us in my signature program, Anything but Average. It’s where I’ll walk you through everything you need to know about starting a coaching business, so click here to enroll and I’ll see you on the inside! 

What You'll Learn on this Episode

  • What produces a feeling of readiness and confidence.
  • The difference between disempowered trust versus empowered belief.
  • Why belief is so important to produce the results you want.
  • How to identify if you’re in disempowered trust.
  • Why trying to control an outcome is the opposite of being in belief.

Featured on the Show

  • If you are ready to take this work deeper and make your dream coaching business a reality, join my Anything but Average program.
  • Join me on Instagram and tag me in all your Anything but Average aha! moments!
LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE

Click to Read Episode Transcript

Welcome to the Anything but Average Podcast where I will teach you how to create a coaching business one step at a time. I’m Lindsey Mango, a life coach passionate about helping you create the life of your wildest dreams by creating a coaching business. Let’s get started.

Hello and welcome back to another week and another episode of Anything but Average. Guys, how are you? I hope you’re having a beautiful week. And I always say I’m excited for every week’s episode, but today’s episode I am uniquely excited because I think it’s going to be so valuable for those of you who have already started your coaching business or want to start your coaching business.

And it is at the crux – is that the right word? It’s at the core of every result you produce in your life, whether it pertains to your coaching business or anything else. But before we get started, I want to tell you guys a quick story about a woman who just joined Anything but Average like, three days ago.

And this woman, she actually came from the Beach Body World, that was originally the network marketing company that I was with. And she had decided, I think maybe six months or a year ago that she wanted to be a coach. And I’ve shared this with you guys before, not all the women in my program have certifications. I don’t have a certification.

In fact, I teach women how to become coaches by mastering tools and using them in their own life. So it’s not necessary. But she had decided that path and she reached out to me a week ago and was asking like, is this the right fit for me? I’m waiting on my certification but I feel like our stories are so similar and I’m just inspired by what you’re doing.

So she was just asking me some questions, and I simply just asked her, why are you waiting for your certification to get started? And for those of you guys who are hearing this, I want you to ask yourself that question. If you’re waiting to get started as a coach, whether you’re waiting on a certification or you’re just waiting to feel ready, I want you to ask yourself that question.

Why are you waiting? And as soon as she started responding, she realized all of it was drama. All of it was I’ll be ready when I get this certification, or I’ll have more clarity when this external circumstance happens. And she caught it. She knows this work so she caught it right away and she was like, oh my gosh, I didn’t even realize I was doing that.

And I was like, yeah, in my program I teach you how to build the confidence you need to start now. And for all of you guys hearing this, if you are waiting on anything to get started, any external circumstance, any certification, any financially to feel ready, all of it, you are giving your power to an external circumstance and you are not changing who you are in this moment, which means you are not going to produce a different result in your life.

Waiting does not produce readiness. You deciding you’re ready, you learning how to build the confidence you need right now to get started is what creates that.

So with all of that said, she was like, I’m joining. So she joined, and it was three days before we have weekly live coaching sessions. You get lifetime access to that. It was a couple days before that. She jumps on the live, we go through all of the confusion she’s having about who does she want to help and all of the things that have kept her from getting started.

And we coach on it, she gets the clarity she needs, she is ready to start, and she’s only been in the program for three days and only went through one live coaching session and has everything she needs to start instead of waiting six more months to start her coaching business.

And this is just the beginning. She hasn’t even been in the program a week. And the reason why I wanted to share that with you guys is a lot of you think that once something external happens, you’ll have the permission or the confidence you need, when that is an inside job. And that is one of the biggest things I help my students do in Anything but Average is make that decision, commit to it, and learn how to create the confidence and the clarity they need now to get started.

Because that comes from you. Not external circumstances, not finding the clarity. It comes from making a clear decision and my process in the program actually teaches you how to do that. We go through how to use coaching tools to change your life and build confidence in your ability to coach.

Then finding your unique purpose and what you’re going to tell people you do and what type of coach you’re going to be. And then we move into actually launching your business, putting it out in the world, and then how to change people’s lives by signing clients.

So it is the framework of everything you need to go from wanting to be a coach to finding your first client. Everything in between that process. Or for some of you guys, we have lots of women who are already coaches who join who want to fine-tune some of their skills and build that confidence and learn how to sign clients in a more effective way.

I say all that to say you can still join Anything but Average at any time. It is open right now. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and if I add a bonus this month for a free training later on or anything like that, I always give whoever enrolls the current month access to that bonus.

I’ve had some people enroll this past month who are like, I just enrolled three days ago before you opened the bonus. You’ll get access to it. I freely give that away so don’t use anything as an excuse to take that step. And I’ll get really clear and look at why aren’t you taking this step?

I’m 99.9% sure that anything you respond to is some sort of drama, fear, doubt, or giving your power away to current circumstances and that’s something we coach on in the group so you learn how to take complete power over your life, your coaching business, your results to get what you want. That’s the only way you get what you want.

So I’m going to jump off my soapbox and get on my other soapbox and I’m going to talk about what I want to teach you guys today. So there is something I teach my students in Anything but Average and I’m really big on and is really big in the coaching industry to produce the results you want and that is belief.

So some of you guys might be hearing this for the first time, some of you guys know the power of belief. And what I wanted to talk about today was how there’s a difference between what I call disempowering trust versus empowered belief.

And what that actually looks like and how to recognize when you’re falling into one versus the other and how to shift into it so you know how to get back into empowered belief and produce the results that you want.

But before we dive in, I want to talk about why belief is so important, why I think of it as the foundation of a house. If it is not rock solid, you’re going to build a house of cards. I feel like I’ve used this example many times but you’re going to build a house of cards on it and it’s going to crumble to the ground the minute anything shakes, the minute you put too much load on the foundation.

So the reason why belief is so important is because it is the foundation of what is producing every single result in your life and in your coaching business. So just to give you an example, you guys have heard on my podcast, I’m a huge advocate for the model, which is something Brooke Castillo teaches, which is all about how your thoughts ultimately create your results.

So your thoughts drive forward the feelings you have, the feelings you have create the actions you take or don’t take, and that produces the results you get in your life. And for example, when you have 1000% belief, that foundational thinking, every feeling, every action, and every result you produce is going to be a reflection of that.

So if you have 1000% belief, I don’t know why I’m saying 1000 but 100% belief that you are going to find your soulmate, every thought you have is going to be born from that belief. Every feeling you have, every action you take, and that is going to be what produces the result.

Even if you meet somebody who isn’t your soulmate or you date them for a little while, when you have that belief, you’re going to be willing to pass on them. You’re going to be willing to see it as an opportunity to get closer to your soulmate because you know your soulmate is there, you know they’re coming, you know you’re going to meet them.

And so that will be what produce your ultimate result of finding your soulmate. The more belief you have, the faster you will produce the results you want. Now, let’s take the same example. If you have 50% belief that you’re going to meet your soulmate, that means every thought, feeling, action, and result is going to be a reflection of that.

So you’re going to have that doubt and your brain is always seeking evidence to support what it already believes. So every person you meet you’re going to be thinking, oh, this is a sign, I’m probably not going to meet my soulmate. Or every person you date, you might start looking past some of the things you know aren’t qualities that you want in your soulmate and you start to settle and allow and that is what produces the results of not finding your soulmate.

So belief is like, the heartbeat of every result you create in your life. When you have it, you’ll create the results you want. When you don’t, you will not. And I want you guys to hear this very clearly that just because you don’t believe in something doesn’t mean – that’s not a problem.

I have a process I teach my students. It’s a huge part of coaching, is learning how to get to that place of being in 100% belief. So every level of growth is going to bring new opportunities of learning how to believe at a higher level.

I always say the first phase of building belief in what you want to get and the result you want to create is not believing. That’s the start of the bridge you have to cross and then over time you have to build belief so you can eventually get across the bridge and produce the result that you want.

So that’s why a belief is so important. This is the same thing of course with your coaching business, with starting your coaching business. If you believe – for those of you who haven’t started yet and you know deep down you want to, if you believed wholeheartedly you would get the result you want, wouldn’t you have started already?

If you believed you’re going to sign clients and your vision you have for your life with your coaching business was guaranteed, wouldn’t you take such different actions? Wouldn’t you show up so differently? If you believed you were going to produce everything you wanted, that would drive forward every thought, feeling, action, and produce the result.

The lack of belief is what keeps you from starting. It’s what keeps you from marketing even more effectively than you already are, if you already have your coaching business. It keeps you from producing the result you want. And this is one of the gaps we close over and over and over.

This is why when you don’t believe, a lot of us are like, “Oh, it’s my marketing, or it’s because my husband doesn’t agree, it’s because my audience is too small.” That is always coming from a place of not believing you’re going to produce the result.

Even confusion is a byproduct of that. Because when you don’t believe you’re going to get the result, you try to take the next right step and you try to figure out what the right path is because you don’t have that belief. When you have that belief, the next step becomes clear.

It has a totally different energy. You’ll be asking questions like what else could I try? Instead of I don’t know what I’m doing, how do I market this? Or how do I get started? So this is why belief is so important.

Now, what I see is something that – I see this in my mastermind students, I see this in my students in Anything but Average, I see something happening where people think they’re believing when really, they’re not. And it’s very sneaky. So I’ve created this concept called disempowered trust versus empowered belief.

Empowered belief means that you feel in complete control of the results you’re producing and you believe in that. Disempowered trust looks like belief, it dresses up in a costume, if you feel like you’re trusting and believing, when in reality, you don’t actually believe you are in control of producing the result that you want. You think life or things have to unfold and happen for you to get the result that you want.

It’s a very slight difference, but it is the difference between creating massive results and getting the result you want in your business, signing clients, growing, all of that, versus having your hands off the wheel and sitting back and waiting and thinking you’re believing and trusting when really you’re not.

So the reason why this is important is because you have to notice when you’re stuck in one and why you’re doing it and learn how to shift back to empowered belief, which is going to produce the result you want.

So what is disempowered trust? Disempowered trust, when I think of that, it’s like your hands are off the wheel. You’re driving a car and you decided I’m going to take my hands off the wheel and see what happens. This can feel like a pressure release. It can feel like you’re relaxed and trusting when in reality, you don’t feel like you are in control of producing the result that you want.

So the only way for you get relief is to just let go. And it’s really sneaky because it can feel like well, no, I just believe, I think life is going to unfold. But the way you will know if you’re actually in disempowered trust is if you don’t feel empowered and like you are the one that creates the results.

If you feel like circumstances, life, things have to happen outside of you to produce the result that you want. That is how you will know. So you will know you’re in disempowered trust when you don’t believe you create your results. When you think you’re trusting but you don’t actually believe you are the one that can produce whatever you want in your coaching business.

Now, you guys might be hearing this and being like, oh my gosh, trust feels like such an important part, and it is, but there’s a difference between empowered trust or empowered belief versus the disempowered trust. So trust does play a role here. A huge part of believing something is going to happen is the space between you believing and life happening and then the result being produced. And there’s trust that has to happen in there.

But when it comes to empowered belief, what that actually looks like is believing you produce the result. It’s believing you will get the result. And trusting that and trusting that that is what is unfolding.

It looks like – I imagine if you’re driving a car, like you have your hand on the wheel and you’re driving it, but if a tree goes in the middle of the street, you still believe that there’s a way to get around it and you are still going to hit your destination, right?

What this doesn’t look like is – what I see a lot of people do is strangle their steering wheel. They’re like, I’m in control, and they don’t have any trust or belief, so they think they’re the only ones that can produce the result that they want.

Control, trying to control an outcome is actually the opposite of belief. Because you think that it’s not going to happen so then you believe you have to get in there and you have to control the outcome. So it’s a very fine line but when it comes to empowered belief, what that looks like is hands on the wheel, you believe you produce your results, you believe you are the creator of your results in your coaching business and in your life, and you also trust that it’s unfolding alongside with that.

You trust that it’s going to happen. Not trusting that you don’t know what’s going to happen and you have no control, we’re just going to let it unfold. It looks like being in control, being empowered. And I want to use the word in control with a grain of salt or whatever the saying is.

Because control in the way of trying to take action to control is different than feeling in control, feeling empowered that you produce your results. So empowered belief looks like believing you create your results. It looks like believing with 100% certainty that the result is inevitable.

And it looks like doing your part to do that. You’re still driving the car, you’re still taking the turns, and you’re trusting you are going to get to your ultimate destination.

Disempowered trust actually looks like not taking action. A lot of times people think, “Well, if I did believe the result was coming, I’m going to sit on the couch and eat bonbons.” It’s actually not true. If you are the person who believes you create the result, you believe the result is happening, and you are the person, you’re going to be inspired, you’re going to want to take action in your business.

So that’s another indication, if you’re in disempowered trust and you don’t believe you create the result, you might not work for seven days and just not even think about it. If you’re in empowered belief, you’re going to take the necessary and inspired action, and then you’re going to go live your life. You’re not going to think about it all day.

On the other side is the controlling lack of belief, meaning you’re trying to get in there, control, and try to change the outcome, work all day, hustle, hustle, hustle. This is how you get burned out because you have no belief.

So I almost think about it like a spectrum. One side of the spectrum is having disempowered trust, hands totally off the wheel. In the middle, the sweet spot, the spot that’s going to create the results you want is empowered belief. And then on the other side is no belief and controlling because you don’t actually think the result is going to come.

We want to get into empowered belief. 100% belief is what will produce every single result in your life and in your coaching business. This is something I teach my students, this is something we go back to over and over and over again because our brains are very tricky and it wants to make the reason why we don’t have results, about all these other things, and yes, there’s some strategy, some pieces, processes, there’s a step-by-step process I teach you in the program and we always make sure that the belief is there first so we’re not adjusting something on a weak foundation.

So the sweet spot is empowered belief. I will teach you how to do that in my program, Anything but Average. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage. I will see you on the inside. Even if you are just struggling with this one concept, join us.

You get access to coaching with me in the community, you get support from the other women in the community, you get weekly live coaching with me and you will fine-tune all of your skills, all of your ability with belief, with your coaching, in the step-by-step program. So I love you guys. I will talk to you next week. Bye.

If you’re ready to take this work deeper and create your own coaching business, join us in Anything but Average, where I will walk you through the step-by-step process to become a coach, start your coaching business, and start signing clients. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and I will see you on the inside.

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