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Ep #109: Not Tying Personal Worth to Results with Anna Brinkworth

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We are in the midst of a series of my mastermind students teaching you their favorite concepts they’ve learned in our work together. They’re on the other side of the work you’re doing, where they’ve created incredible businesses they love while living the life of their dreams. 

Every single one of my guest hosts has risen from the ground up, from signing their first clients, to a place where they’re now running full-time five and six-figure coaching businesses. On this episode, you’re hearing from Anna Brinkworth, a life and mindset coach who helps her clients tap into an up-leveled frequency where they feel balanced, badass, and confident as they create their dream results.

Tune in this week as Anna walks you through the most pivotal concept she learned inside ABA. She’s sharing the transformations she’s experienced in her own life, showing you how to accept yourself from a place of genuine self-love, and sharing what’s possible when you decide you’re successful and worthy as you are right now.

 

Anything but Average has now closed for enrolment, but doors will reopen on July, 6th. If you want to join the next round, click here and join the waitlist, where you’ll get access to some amazing resources.

The Anything but Average Coach Mastermind is now closed for enrolment. If you want to be in the fall class, make sure to mark your calendars for August 31st.

What You'll Learn on this Episode

  • What Anna’s coaching journey has looked like. 
  • The most pivotal concept Anna learned inside ABA. 
  • How to decide you are worthy and enough as you are right now. 
  • Why you have to stop tying your worth to the results you’re creating. 
  • What happens when you aren’t reliant on tangible evidence of your success. 

Featured on the Show

  • If you are ready to take this work deeper and make your dream coaching business a reality, join my Anything but Average program.
  • Join me on Instagram and tag me in all your Anything but Average aha! moments!
  • Anna Brinkworth: Instagram
LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE

Click to Read Episode Transcript

Anything But Average is officially closed for enrollment and will reopen on July 6th. If you want to join the next round of Anything But Average, go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and join the wait list.

On the wait list you will receive a step by step process on how to start saving for the investment so when enrollment reopens you are ready to join. You will also get a bonus of how to start preparing for your coaching business and how to start preparing for the program so that when you join you can hit the ground running as soon as you enroll.

You’ll also get sneak peek access into the program, into the live coaching sessions, into the portal, and exactly what you get in the portal as well as the results people are creating every 30 days. Again, go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and I will see you on the inside.

Welcome to the Anything But Average podcast where I will teach you how to create a coaching business one step at a time. I’m Lindsey Mango, a life coach passionate about helping you create the life of your wildest dreams by creating a coaching business. Let’s get started.

Hello, and welcome back to another week and another episode of Anything But Average. Over the next six podcast episodes you are going to be hearing from six different mastermind students who are going to teach you their favorite concept that they have learned in our work together. These mastermind students have created $40,000 businesses, $100,000 businesses doing work that they love while creating the life that they really want.

I specifically chose these six mastermind students because they started in Anything But Average or my old variation of the program, which was called Mango Magic, where they got started in their coaching business, signed their first few clients, and have risen up from that level to the mastermind level where they are really creating the full-time coaching business, 100K business that they set out to create from the beginning.

I wanted their unique perspective because they started at the ground up in our work together and I wanted them to teach you a concept that helped them at that point in their business. So without further ado I’d like to introduce my mastermind students to you, and their individual podcast episode on one of their favorite concepts that we’ve worked on together.

Hello, and welcome to another episode of the Anything But Average podcast. I am your guest host, Anna Brinkworth. I am a life and mindset coach who helps my clients tap into an up-leveled frequency where they feel balanced, badass, confident, and abundant in the life and results they decide to create. I help women finally prioritize themself without the guilt and drop the comparison and people pleasing for a rock solid foundation of internal validation and worthiness to live a life that freaking feels good.

Just a little bit about me and my coaching journey, I joined ABA in April of 2021 while working part time as a physical therapist. I launched my business eight weeks later in June, and signed my first three clients in the first three weeks of launching my coaching business.

I decided to join Lindsay’s mastermind in October of 21 and have since replaced my income as a PT in the schools working with kids with special needs with my coaching business revenue. I am so proud to say that I am going all in on my coaching business when this school year wraps up and will be ending my 14 year career as a PT to become full time in my coaching business.

I want to thank Lindsey for having me do a guest recording for her podcast today. I am so excited to talk about a concept that I learned in ABA that was so pivotal for me. Not only as a coach, but as a human. And that is not tying your worth and your success to your results and to what other people think about it, or what they are doing. As a recovering people pleaser and perfectionist I know all about this.

Before stepping into the coaching world I had always tied my worth to what people thought about me and to my achievements. I thrived on external stuff like receiving compliments when I thought I was liked and accepted by everyone and their mother, so I became the ultimate people pleaser. When I was invited to a party with the popular crowd in high school and I felt like I fit in because I felt seen and that felt safe and good. When I was a peacemaker and a fixer.

I put other people’s wants before my own. I said yes to everything and everyone. I was a high achiever, when I became a PT I got my doctorate and it was like me proving to myself I’m smart enough. I pushed myself the most. Look, I have the highest degree possible. It was those things that confirmed and proved I was good enough, and generous enough, and smart enough.

Achievements that I had made and other people’s opinions for so long, was what was proving that I was enough. It really kept me living to make other people comfortable. It prevented me from sharing my authentic self with the world. It kept me waiting, and wishing, and justifying, and sometimes resenting.

At home I would keep it all together for as long as I could, serving everyone else beautifully and putting myself last. And then anxiety, and shame, and anger would take over. I would get triggered, overreact, yell, stomp around, blame my spouse, or my kids, or whatever my ego was serving up as the default escape, and it was awful.

So what does that have to do with the concept of deciding you are worthy and enough, with not attaching your success to your results? Well, even though I didn’t need permission, it gave me the permission to be right where I was with a result or not, without validation from someone else.

It really helped me realize that the story line of my not enoughness was simply not true. That my unchecked ego would only continue to create results that were small woe is me, justify everything, blame whomever kind of results that I didn’t want.

It helped me learn how to accept myself from a genuine place of self-love. It really helped me start to partner with my feelings in my body, instead of against myself. Instead of me just trying to fix everything, or pretend like nothing was wrong. Which, of course, led to me being resentful.

The awareness and the partnering with my body has led me to be less reactive. You know, basically not losing my shit as much as I used to when things felt like they were piling up. Like the laundry, and dishes, and being a taxi to and from my kids’ practices, and groceries, and helping with homework, and doing virtual school, and starting up my own business while working and all the things.

I was able to make a conscious decision that I was good enough. That I was always right where I needed to be, and that there was no such thing as being behind. I stopped judging myself and being so hard on myself. A lot of things shifted when I did this, but the biggest was that I began to take action that did not need anyone’s approval but my own. And for the first time in a long time I felt free, and bold, and unstoppable.

Deciding that you are worthy and successful before you have any results, and without anyone else’s approval but your own, helps you step into your genuine self, just as you are. When you do this, your true confidence will shine. And you get to drop the perfectionism, the pleasing, the external validation, the hustle, the armor. Nothing is more freeing than showing up as your true self.

Authenticity and genuine confidence, I believe, are the most beautiful things on the planet. And they are what creates the results that you are dreaming of every time. You know, the old me would have never thought I could have become a life coach.

I would have said, “I invested $130,000 in getting my doctorate, I must be a PT for the rest of my life. This is who I said I was to the world. I can’t change it. What would people think? I’ve got a good job, it’s really flexible. It’s got great benefits and I’ve got a pension. It would be crazy to think I could do anything else.”

That whole time I never had tangible evidence that I was going to create a successful coaching business. But what I did have was the belief. Belief helped me realize I didn’t have to play small. I didn’t have to be so agreeable all the time. I didn’t have to worry about how any other coach was doing it. I didn’t have to get it right or perfect because there literally is no such thing. And I certainly didn’t need to keep putting my own needs last.

So think about a result you are waiting on that you want so badly. Think about what you think you will feel when you create that result. What thoughts would you have about yourself? Are you waiting on that result to feel successful and worthy? I challenge you to find evidence of why and how you are already successful.

Give your brain that tangible that it wants, even if it’s not the exact result you are trying to create, because you haven’t created it yet. But what else can you come up with? If you want to sign your first client, but are waiting on that result to feel successful as a coach, you are missing out on all that you have to offer right now.

If you keep waiting on a result to feel successful or worthy, you will be waiting forever. And the same shit will come back up when you hit that goal or create your result, whether you have made 10k or 100k, if you haven’t worked on your thoughts and beliefs around your inherent worthiness and your inherent success right now.

But once you have gotten very aware and you start observing where you are coupling your success with an achievement or someone else’s outside validation, you will be able to compassionately rewire those thoughts. Those are just thought errors from your ego. And you certainly don’t have to believe them.

You get to trust in your worth and success no matter what. And when you cultivate this ability, you will be able to tap into inspired energy, no matter what the result ends up being because you hold this incredible belief for yourself. What happens next is that you end up taking action from this place of knowing, from energetic magnetism and certainty. Belief is independent of circumstance or mood. It truly flows through you with a calm feeling of home.

Belief leads to action that is full of abundant service and contribution to the world, to your clients, to that one person in need. Instead of significance, which is ego-based, right? Like, what do they think of my post? Is it good enough? How many likes did I get? I don’t know what to say, I don’t have an email list, a website, a certification, so I’m just behind. All those things that can start coming up. You simply get to decide that you are worthy and that you have something valuable to offer despite any result.

Decoupling your worth and your success from your results, and from the opinions of others will change your life. Just imagine if you started showing up with total confidence in yourself, in your offer, and in service to others. Not needing that external validation or compliment. Not needing to sign 10 clients or make a certain amount of money per month to prove who and what you are. Nope.

As Lindsay teaches, you just get to decide. And doing so ahead of time is the most freeing thing and the best gift you could ever give yourself. It’s just the best.

So I want to end this podcast with some questions. What would it look like if you let yourself be right where you are right now without judgment? How are you already worthy and successful with your current results? And how is it still okay to have a big goal and a big dream and to show up as that coach now, even without having created the results you want to create yet? You simply just get to decide. So what’s it going to be?

I hope you got some golden nuggets today. I’d love to connect with you and hear how you are believing in yourself and in your potential well before that big result you want to create comes to fruition. You can find me on Instagram at Anna.Brinkworth. Thank you so much for listening and sharing this space with me today. Have a wonderful day. Bye.

If you’re ready to take this work deeper and create your own coaching business, join us in Anything But Average where I will walk you through the step by step process to become a coach, start your coaching business, and start signing clients. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and I will see you on the inside.

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