Welcome to the Anything But Average podcast where I will teach you how to create a coaching business one step at a time. I’m Lindsey Mango, a life coach passionate about helping you create the life of your wildest dreams by creating a coaching business. Let’s get started.
Hello and welcome back to another week and another episode of Anything But Average. Before we dive into today’s episode I want to make sure you know that Anything But Average reopens for enrollment July 6th. This is my program that teaches you how to start a coaching business and sign your first clients so you can create the life that you really want.
Today we are featuring a podcast episode with Renee Weaver, a student and friend of mine and my husband, Chris. And I’m so excited for you guys to hear this episode and her perspective. So I’ve done an interview with Renee in the past but that episode is solely her teaching a concept that she learned from being in Anything But Average and starting her own coaching business.
And I think her perspective is very interesting and valuable because she has been around Chris and I, she’s one of Chris’s childhood friends. She’s been around since the very beginning of Chris starting his coaching business and when I came into his world and me running a coaching business.
And I’ll never forget the first time I met her thinking like this girl is a counselor, she would be an amazing coach. And it took her four or five years to realize that she wanted to do that and to work up the courage to go out and do that. And that’s really what she talks about today on the episode.
She talks about what it looks like to feel 80%, 90% ready and deciding to start instead of waiting to be 100% ready to join Anything But Average and to start her coaching business. Because that’s where so many people get stuck, they get stuck thinking that they have to be 100% ready and you never are. Because the readiness doesn’t come from you waiting for a certain circumstance in time, it comes from you deciding.
So I just want to introduce you guys to Renee, who you’ve heard from before but today she’s talking about diving in before you’re ready, how to actually go all in on what you actually want and start your coaching business when you feel like you’re only 80% or 90% ready to do it.
Renee: Hey guys, welcome back to the Anything But Average podcast. I’m so glad you’re here today, we are going to have some fun. So I am Renee Weaver and I’m your guest for today’s episode. I’m a life and mindset coach. I help driven people get out of their own way so they can achieve their highest goals while becoming more authentic, powerful versions of themselves through mindset and embodiment work. Basically, I help people create exactly what it is they really want.
I joined ABA a year ago and just completed my first round of the mastermind. And listen, I’m so glad to be here today because I get to share with you what was one of the most impactful things I learned from ABA. And I’m happy to share it with you today because being able to do this thing is what allowed me to launch my coaching business and keep going even when I wasn’t exactly sure what my results would be.
So if you out there listening right now, if you want to start your own coaching business, or have the courage and confidence to keep going if you’ve already started but things feel daunting or scary or slow, this is what you need to hear today.
Okay, so here’s the treat you are in for, let me break it down for you. I’m going to briefly share how I got into coaching and ABA. I’m going to tell you the one thing Lindsey said to me that gave me that one ounce more of courage than fear to take the leap, to invest in myself and start my own coaching business.
I’m going to share what keeps you from going after what you really want. Trust me, it’s not what you think. I’m going to share how to get what you really want, it’s also not what you think. And lastly, I’ll let you in on some powerful thoughts that you can borrow, take them, run with them to create confidence within yourself to take the leap on going after what you really want. You’ll definitely want to stick around for those. Ready? Let’s dive in.
So, I was a school psychologist working in the public schools for 10 years before starting my coaching business. And each and every one of those 10 years there was a tiny voice inside and a feeling in my gut that was telling me that it just wasn’t the right fit for me. I didn’t feel in total alignment. I didn’t feel like I was living my purpose or living up to my potential.
If you’re listening right now, I’m guessing you can relate to this feeling in some way in your own life, and it sucks. When I made the decision, yes, it’s a choice, y’all. When I made the decision to listen to my inner voice, and follow my gut feeling, I found coaching.
So why did I join ABA? Well, as you know, Lindsey is a living example of creating a thriving coaching business without hustle or burnout or overwhelm, and while still intentionally making space for all the other parts of life that you love, and that’s what I wanted.
So the thing that you may have experienced is that just because you want something, doesn’t mean your brain is going to make it feel safe to go get it. You feel me? I know you know what this feels like. You know you have more to offer the world and that the world has more to offer you. And yet you stay stuck in indecision about actually doing the thing that you are being called to do because it feels freaking risky. You don’t want to be irresponsible, and I have little air quotes around that, right?
So let me clear that up for you right now. Listen, the only reason something feels irresponsible or unreasonable to you is because you have been practicing thoughts your whole life that your status quo is reasonable. And therefore anything else is unreasonable to your brain, right? Reasonable is a belief system and you get to change your belief system at any time.
Okay, so I won’t keep you waiting any longer on what Lindsey said. Let me paint the picture, so there I was waffling and spinning out in this, I don’t know what to do. Can I really do this? Is this responsible? I’ll just wait a little longer until I’m really ready place, like that’s where I was. And Lindsey came to my rescue by saying these words. She said, “What if you won’t ever be 100% ready? What if that’s okay? What if you can start from a place of being 80% ready, 90% ready?”
What? That blew my mind because historically I have been a planner, a perfectionist. Why the hell wouldn’t you do something the right way if you could? And of course, I always felt like I could. That’s that perfectionism, right? So let me go take hours and hours to prepare for the best way and then all will be perfect and it will all work out according to my plan. I know you know what I’m talking about.
The thing is, what I didn’t realize at the time was those were just stories I was telling myself. Very unhelpful stories at that. I could have just as easily told myself that progress is better than perfection. And maybe my first client was right there waiting for a coach, wanting so badly to feel better and go after their dreams. And if I put off launching my coaching business, I wouldn’t be there to support her, to hold the belief for her, to show her what is possible.
So with those few questions from Lindsey, what if you won’t ever be 100% ready? What if that’s okay? What if you can start from a place of being 80% ready, 90% ready? With those questions I was then in a place where I could challenge my old thinking, choose to throw out my old thinking, and choose to pick something new that served me.
So I started thinking what if I could just choose to start at 90% ready? What if that was actually better? What if there was no better, right? So guys, if you want to change the game for yourself, challenge those thoughts that you are currently clinging to because they may be a life raft that feels so safe, but if you can let go of them then you’ll have the capacity to reach up and climb into the lifeboat. The one with the motor and then you can steer that boat wherever it is you want to go.
So going on with this, once I invested in the ABA program one thing that Lindsey coached me on that I still think about today when I’m doing something new or that feels scary, she said, “If you want to learn to swim, you’ve got to get into the water. Sure you can practice your strokes on the side, but you won’t really learn how to use them if you aren’t in the water.” And it’s like, damn, that’s so true.
This is the same with everything in life, isn’t it? If you want to build a business, you can read all the books, you can listen to all the podcasts, you can talk to all the mentors. But if you don’t decide to get your hands dirty and just start seeing what works for you, you will never build your own business or create what it is you really want. And that’s not good for you. And that’s not good for the world, we need you. There’s so much within you that we need, that we need to shine a huge spotlight on, right?
If you keep pushing off taking the leap until you’re ready, you’re also training your brain that circumstances and actions create your results instead of what really creates results, which is, of course, your thoughts.
Okay, so what keeps you from going after what you really want? I’m going to start with what it’s not. It’s not that you don’t have enough time, or money, or motivation, or discipline. Don’t use those, it’s not any of those. This is what it is, it’s the stories you are telling yourself. It’s the narrative that you are playing in your head day in and day out.
Listen, you could be a trust fund baby with no need for a job, right? So you have all the time in the world, and all the money in the world. And you could be fully motivated and dedicated to doing something more because you’re bored and you want to serve others and live a life of purpose and not just bathe in your dollar bills all day. You could have all of that. But if you are telling yourself unhelpful stories about your abilities and your capabilities, if you can do it or not, you still won’t create what you want.
So what are some of the things you may be telling yourself and believing that are keeping you from what you really want? Okay, well, you could be telling yourself scary stories about what could be, instead of inspiring stories about what could be. So the scary ones would be like it might not work out, I might be judged, I might fail. Versus what could be, it might work out. I might inspire and support people and help them change their lives. I might succeed, right?
You could be telling yourself you’ll wait until you’re ready. And we know that ready is just a thought. You could be telling yourself that once you do X or Y or Z, then you’ll feel more competent and confident to get going, right? Those stories are not ever going to get you what you really want. They’re just not. If you’re noticing that that’s what’s coming up in your brain it’s not a problem. Just notice it and be like, hmm, I don’t choose that, it doesn’t serve me.
So let me tell you, how do you get what you really want? Let’s again start with what it’s not. Hear me, you don’t get what you really want by cracking some secret code. There’s no secret code. It’s not just sitting all day repeating affirmations and trying to will yourself to believe them and will them into existence.
It’s not waiting for someone to come find you and notice how amazing you are and save you. It’s not overthinking and over planning and making the perfect 50 step plan to get from A to Z. Nope. Guys, I wish they did, they won’t work. And I know it because I’ve tried them, right?
Again, not a problem if that’s where you are. But let me tell you how to get what you do want. It’s this, listen, engage in deep self-love. Talk to yourself and cheer yourself on like you would talk to and cheer on your child or best friend. Choose to practice deep self-trust. You know you best, trust yourself. Believe yourself. Honor yourself. Hear me, you are not going to ruin your own life. Follow your gut and trust that you will lead yourself exactly where you want and need to be.
Have one more ounce of courage than fear. You don’t have to have 100% faith that everything will work out. You don’t have to be 100% courageous and confident. You just need that one little, tiny ounce more of courage than fear to take the leap. Trust me, I had one little ounce more, I did not have 100%. You don’t need it either.
Do the thing. It’s a decision, it’s simple, you just choose to jump in the damn water. Close your eyes, hold your breath, scream if you want to, and just jump in. Listen, it doesn’t matter if you belly flop, pencil dive, front flip, cannonball, whatever, just get yourself in the water.
Deepen your self-awareness. Notice what thoughts take up the majority of your brain space and precious energy. Release thoughts that don’t support you. Choose thoughts that do support you lean into lifelong learning and growth.
New fears and challenges will come up for you at every level so you may as well get used to it. Learn to enjoy it, enjoy the ride. Learn to even look for this feeling as a signpost that you are on the right track, that you are making forward progress instead of staying stagnant in your safe feeling comfort zone.
All right, so finally here are some powerful thoughts you can borrow from me if you’re having a hard time creating thoughts to help you dive into your own pool. I got quite a few of them, well, like I don’t know, eight. So here we go.
Progress is better than perfection. Diving into the pool, even when I don’t feel 100% ready, is one thing I’ll be teaching my clients to do. It’s my job as a coach to go first. It is a choice to be ready, I choose to be ready today. My free stroke may look on point on the deck, but if I want it to actually propel me forward, I choose to get in the water.
Not feeling 100% ready is exactly where I need to be right now. This is my growth. Diving in is my opportunity for expansion. 90% ready is ready enough. I can always grab onto the wall for support if I need it. Look out below, here I freaking come. And if you’re a bit of a swearer like me, look at my fucking back stroke, I’m a beautiful fucking swan.
All right, so there you have it, guys. Embrace your inner swan. Dive into the pool, that’s how you’ll learn to swim. Embrace your inner badass, your inner knowing. Trust yourself, go for that dream. Go for that goal you really want. That’s how you’ll create it. 90% ready is ready enough.
If you want to take this work further, I have a couple questions you can ask yourself. Give yourself time to reflect on them, to journal on them, to coach on them.
So I have three questions, if you out there have the thought it’s totally better to wait and feel 100% ready to do the thing, than go ahead and start when I don’t feel 100% ready. If that’s where your brain is, ask yourself this, why do I actually want to prove myself wrong, that I don’t have to be 100% ready in order to do the thing? Whether that thing is investing yourself, launching your business, whatever it is, why do you want to prove yourself or that thought more, why do you want to prove that thought wrong?
Second question you can ask yourself is if I believed that 90% ready was ready enough, what new results could I create in my life this week? And the third question I have for you, how could it be true that choosing to dive in at 90% ready could feel better, create success faster, and help me achieve my goals faster than waiting until I feel 100% ready?
So what I want to offer to you is to really sit with those questions. Get really curious about how your brain immediately wants to respond to those questions and take some time to answer them for yourself. It might just give you the courage and confidence you need to take that next leap you need to take for your growth and expansion.
All right, I loved getting to share this with you today and I hope it was helpful for you and that you got exactly what you needed. Or that you got exactly what you didn’t even know you needed. I want to thank Lindsey for asking me to guest coach today. If you want to connect with me you can find me on Instagram, it’s @ReneeWeaver_ , that’s R-E-N-E-E-W-E-A-V-E-R underscore.
And guys before I sign off, I just want to tell you this, I have zero doubt in your ability to do that thing that feels scary or risky right now. Listen to this episode again, answer the questions I posed, and get out there and start swimming. You’re a beautiful fucking swan, you got this. Thanks for listening, bye.
If you’re ready to take this work deeper and create your own coaching business, join us in Anything But Average where I will walk you through the step-by-step process to become a coach, start your coaching business, and start signing clients. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and I will see you on the inside.
