[SCEO] 89: The First Step to Lasting Change

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Do you ever find yourself doing the same things over and over again? Whether it’s in relation to your weight goals, relationships, or your job, you find yourself in this perpetual cycle of getting the same results, even after attempting change repeatedly.

The core of the thought work I teach revolves around managing our thoughts and feelings, but it can be hard to implement when our brains have become so used to working on default. This week, I’m showing you how you can start to create lasting change in your life. It’s a really simple first step, but can also be super challenging, so it’s important to practice this as much as you can.

Tune in today to discover why you might be creating similar results over and over again, and why you keep finding yourself stuck in the same spots. Letting yourself celebrate along the way during this process is key, and learning this is truly the path to real transformation. 

I have a program called The Coach Business Academy, which focuses on helping service-based, heart-centered coaches and business owners attract and sign clients in their businesses. This is a program that is going to help you challenge beliefs that aren’t serving you and change them to bring your business to the next level. You also get lifetime access and lifetime support, so what are you waiting for? See you there!

What You'll Learn on this Episode

  • Why change can be so challenging.
  • The signals that tell us we are operating from our subconscious mind.
  • Why our brains like operating from default.
  • How to start taking steps to create real lasting change.

Featured on the Show

  • If you are ready to take this work deeper and make your dream business a reality,  join my Mango Magic Business Academy.
  • Or if you don’t have a business and you are ready to bring your dream life to reality and know you are meant for more, my Mango Magic Life School is also available.
  • Join me on Instagram and tag me in all your Soul CEO aha! moments!
  • Don’t forget to grab your free training of my High-Vibe Formula (how I created a multiple six-figure business, attracted the man of my dreams, and created a life with complete time freedom…in less than 18 months)!
  • Brooke Castillo

Click to Read Episode Transcript

Hi girl, welcome to Soul CEO; a podcast for women who know they’re destined for more. I’m Lindsey Mango and I’m going to show you that you can have it all and teach you how to get it by becoming the CEO of your soul, life, and business. Let’s get started.

Hello, how are you guys? Oh my gosh, I’m so excited to be back. I know you guys have been hearing from me every week on the podcast because I batch them, but I was at my wedding and then I had a mastermind thing that I was actually attending, not running, and then we were on our honeymoon for nine days.

And it was all freaking amazing but I will tell you guys, when you do what you love, being away from it for that long and not coaching and not creating is really hard for me. I truly missed it and was so excited to get back while I was enjoying the time, of course, with my husband. I’m going to use that a lot.

And yeah, I just am super excited to be back talking to all of you guys, sharing my content, doing all the things, and just gearing up for 2020 because I’ve got some huge freaking stuff coming. And honestly, a lot of it scares the crap out of me. I will tell you guys, the past couple of days, I have been acting like a little child.

I’m not kidding you. I have just wanted to stomp my feet and even though I was excited to get back, not really do the things and commit to the goals that I have because they’re so freaking big and so scary. And I hope all of you guys are setting goals like that for yourself in 2020.

The type of goals that make you want to curl up and just be like, you know what – I made a post about this today actually, but you know what, I’m just going to sell everything, move to a mountain, and just not do this. That’s when you know you’re playing really, really big.

That actually kind of leads me into today’s topic. We are actually going to take it way back to the beginning and talk about what is the first step to real change and real transformation and real results.

So I want you guys to think about something in your life that you have kind of perpetuated this cycle of over and over and over again. And what I mean by that is let’s say you’ve dieted and you’ve never really gotten to that either goal weight – I’m not really a big weight person, but I mean, goal body or whatever it is.

And you just keep finding yourself repeating the same cycle, or maybe you were like me and you’re quitting jobs over and over and over again, and you keep finding yourself feeling unfulfilled and keep making decisions thinking it’s going to be the thing, and then you continue to produce the same results.

Maybe you’re doing it with guys. Maybe you realize you’re breaking up with the guy, going to find another one, and you end up with a similar guy. Here’s the thing; this is why what I teach and what I implement in my life is so important.

Because – I’m going to totally butcher this fact, but I believe by the time we’re 32 or something like that, maybe 30, 80%, again, this is also a guess-timate. I don’t know the exact number but I believe it’s like 80% of the way we do things, meaning the way we make decisions, the way we react, even the emotions we feel when something happens in our lives are subconscious.

I’m going to say that again. By the time we’re 30 or 32, 80% of the things that we do, feel, the results that we’re getting, the way we’re reacting, the way we’re feeling, the way we’re making decisions are in our subconscious mind. Like what?

Really think about that. What does that actually mean? Well, I’ll tell you what that actually means is that you’re going to keep creating the same results over and over and over again in different ways. Or I call it your default life. Basically the life that you’re going to have if nothing changes, or the results that you’re going to have if nothing changes.

And this is honestly why change can be so challenging because when it’s in your subconscious mind, then it’s literally like – I think about it like a computer. You are just operating like a computer.

So have you ever had your mom or significant other say something and it wasn’t even a big thing, but all of a sudden it just triggered this massive emotion and response out of you? You’re operating off of your subconscious mind.

And the reason why our brain does this is because it’s efficient. It doesn’t take a lot of energy. If it already knows, hey, x, y, z happens, this is how I respond, and I can put that into my subconscious and just operate off of kind of an efficient computer, then I don’t have to work as hard.

And while this serves us in a lot of ways, you don’t want to have to think about driving every time you get in the car. You know how you can just kind of drive and be like, how did I get here? That’s your subconscious mind working.

But in other ways, it really doesn’t serve us because it keeps us creating similar results over and over and over again, and it keeps us getting stuck and blocked in the same spot. So how do you actually change this?

This is the first step to real change, to real results, to real transformation. It’s awareness. And I know that sounds so simple and I know some of you guys who are listening have super high levels of awareness, which is super amazing, it’s super beautiful, but at every level, there’s new levels of awareness.

Because if you don’t know what subconscious thoughts and feelings and things that are going on that are literally running your life, you are like a robot and you’re going to keep doing the same things over and over again. So if you find that happening, how do you actually bring awareness to it?

Well, first of all, you’re going to listen to this podcast and you’re going to be like, I need to be more aware. And when I say aware, what I mean is like, tapping in, and I call it your emotional temperature. Taking your emotional temperature. How do you feel in this moment, in that moment? When you go into your day and you’re having a conversation, what feeling is coming up for you?

And then after the fact, or while it’s happening, you can say, well, what am I thinking right now? What’s coming up for me? What’s driving all of this? Because as you guys know, I’ve taught this on this podcast before, but Brooke Castillo’s model is one of the huge things that I work from and teach from, but it’s all about how our thoughts create our feelings, which create our actions or inactions, which then create our results.

So to make real change, we have to change things at the thought level. And I know you guys are thinking, I’m not consciously thinking, “Oh, get mad at my boyfriend,” or whatever. Eat the donut. But it’s something that’s happening subconsciously.

And so the first step to any change is just paying attention. In fact, I remember when I first hired my coach, my first coach ever, I remember being like, frustrated because I was like, well now I’m noticing all of these thoughts and all of these things and it’s like, wow, what’s going on in that brain and in my feelings and all of that?

And she was like, this is one of the biggest transformations you can have is just having awareness. So celebrating that. Celebrating the fact that you are recognizing what am I thinking, what am I feeling, what’s really below the surface here?

Because when you know that, you have the keys to life. You have the key to change. Now, that’s where a lot of other pieces come in. If you really believe a thought or something that isn’t serving you to create the life you want, how do you shift it?

We can cover that. I’m sure I’ve covered that in past podcasts as well. But I just want to focus on awareness. I just want you guys in this moment to focus on awareness. Where in your life are you recreating the same things over and over again? Why? Ask yourself why.

What do I believe about the thing that I really want? Do I think it’s going to be hard? Do I think it’s going to be painful? Do I think people aren’t going to like me? What is blocking me from breaking through?

And just know that if you are like, huh, that’s really interesting, I’m having this thought, my boyfriend didn’t text me back for three hours and I freaked out, that’s really interesting, because the reality is all of you guys listening, everything is a neutral event.

And I know that sounds crazy, but everything is neutral. Any circumstance is neutral and then our thoughts and our feelings are what create the experience that we have. And if all of that is driving our actions, and that creates our results, we need to bring awareness to them.

So the thing I want you guys to work on this week is just elevating your awareness. Even if you have to set an alarm three times a day and just be like, hey, how are you feeling? Because when I think back, I was operating off that subconscious computer so strong.

I was literally like a robot of habit. I just did the same things. I had no idea. I’d get mad at my boyfriend, my past boyfriend, I didn’t even know why, or I’d be resentful. I never really peeled back the layers. And so the best thing you guys can do to really – if you are like, I am ready for change, is elevate your awareness.

Pay attention to what’s going on in your mind and what’s going on in your heart and how you’re feeling, and that alone, just doing that, you have to celebrate it. You have to see how transformative that is and then you can get into actually changing.

But that’s where it all starts. That’s where change begins. I love you guys. I’m so excited to hear your feedback on this episode. Please share this episode on your Instagram story. Tag me. My handle is @lindseymango_. I’m not changing that.

I am changing my last name to Goodman for regular life, like when we book hotels and all that, but for business, we are keeping it Mango. So please tag me, share it, you never know who needs to hear this message and I’m so grateful for each and every one of you. I hope you have a beautiful day. Bye. Love you.

Thank you for tuning into today’s episode of Soul CEO. If you are ready to take this work deeper and you want to bring your dream business or a reality, I wanted to make sure that you knew that Mango Magic Business Academy was available to you. Head to lindseymangocoaching.com/mangomagic.

Or if you don’t have a business and you are ready to bring your dream life to a reality and know you are meant for more, my Mango Magic Life School is also available. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/mangomagiclifeschool for all the details. These programs are both life and business changing and you get access and coaching with me to walk through the modules and ask questions and get support to make your dream life or your dream business, or both a reality. I love you. I can’t wait to see you in there.

I love hearing from you!

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