Welcome to the Anything But Average podcast where I will teach you how to create a coaching business one step at a time. I’m Lindsey Mango, a life coach passionate about helping you create the life of your wildest dreams by creating a coaching business. Let’s get started.
Lindsey: Hello and welcome back to another week and another episode of Anything But Average. Guys, how are you? We have another podcast interview with one of my mastermind students. I’m so excited for you guys to hear from her. She actually, we kick it way back to like Mango Magic, one of my early programs that she joined. And now she’s in the Anything But Average Coach Mastermind.
This is her first round, her results are going to blow your mind and I’m so excited for you guys to hear her story. So I want to introduce Whitney Barbary, she’s a life and business coach who shows Christian entrepreneurs how to make a lot of money. Welcome, Whitney.
Lindsey: How are you?
Whitney: I’m really good. The sun is out, I’m like, this is an amazing day for a podcast.
Lindsey: So good. Yeah. Where do you live? I forget.
Whitney: You know what? I always want to tell you this and then I’m like, I don’t want to be weird.
Lindsey: You’re in Kentucky too, right? Louisville?
Whitney: No, I live in Evansville, Indiana. So I’m like an hour and 30 minutes from you.
Lindsey: Oh my gosh.
Whitney: I always want to be like, “I go to Louisville like twice a month.” I don’t want her to think I like stalk her there, but yeah, I’m like an hour and a half away.
Lindsey: Tell me next time you’re here, I felt like you were close.
Whitney: I will, I for sure will. I am.
Lindsey: So good. All right, let’s start the story. How did you get into coaching and just kind of your journey? Start it wherever you feel like you want to start.
Whitney: Yeah, I think I have pretty much the same story, as far as any coaches I’ve ever talked to you. I do feel like so many of us get into it for the same reason. Somehow, most of us come across a life coach somehow, right? And it changes our life and then we’re like, I need to do this for other people. That was literally my story.
I heard of, like there was a friend of mine that had gotten certified. She was posting on Facebook that she was taking free clients. And I was like, “I’ll be a free client.” And then we coached for six week and I was like, “I need a life coach.” And it changed my life and then I decided I need to bring this to the world. Like I need other women to know that this gift is there for them.
So I got certified and then I, well I was going to say I hit the ground running, but I attempted to hit the ground running. My first couple years were a struggle, but we got there.
Lindsey: So good. So tell me more about that part of your journey.
Whitney: Yeah, I’m like, well, I guess I hit the ground running energetically, like I was all in. But my business, I felt like that Warner Brothers cartoon where I was just like running but my feet were just spinning in circles but he’s not going anywhere.
My first year in business I actually made $3,000 for the whole year, which that money did not come in every month. But when you divide it up it’s $250 a month if I divide it up evenly, which just makes me laugh every time I say it. I did not have any guidance when I first started my business.
Actually, I guess I don’t really laugh about it because it’s not really funny. But I was just coaching my certification clients. I have this life coaching certification and they were kind of freaking out and I was telling them like, you guys listen to me, when I got certified my coach literally told me do not take calls on Zoom, you only take them on the phone so that when your client brings something to the call, you just Google the answer and they don’t know. And that’s literally how I learned to coach.
Lindsey: Oh my gosh.
Whitney: And even then I thought this doesn’t feel in integrity. So I basically came out and like really didn’t know how to coach. I was just winging it, Googling things on calls with clients hoping that I was saying anything helpful. And then, obviously, you can’t show up and sell your coaching with conviction when you’re like, “I don’t know, I just Google the answers.”
So my first year was really hard. I didn’t have a business coach, I didn’t even really know business coaches existed. I was just hungry and I was just willing to try anything. And I was just literally doing that.
I think I joined, so you would have been my first like business coach. And I think I did that, do you remember what year that was?
Lindsey: Oh my gosh, I don’t even know.
Whitney: I actually don’t remember.
Lindsey: Like 2018? I don’t know.
Whitney: I started my business in 2018 And I can’t remember how long I went before I hired you. I know I made more money after I came in Mango Magic, so it may have been early in 2019. I don’t remember.
Lindsey: Yeah, maybe.
Whitney: But I found you and I joined Mango Magic and that was like the first real structure I ever had in this is how you sell a business and market a business and coach clients. That changed a lot of things.
Lindsey: So good.
Whitney: And it was such an up-level too, because that was the year that you did the in person event at the Omni in Louisville, right?
Whitney: And so that was the first time I ever experienced coming together in person with other coaches that a lot of them were are doing much better than me. And so to get to sit in a room with other high level entrepreneurs and be in a room with you and your energy and their energy, I felt very legit. It’s like I was like, I’m really a coach like.
It just felt very, I don’t want to say professional in the sense of like corporate nine to five, but it made me feel like, dude, this is like what real coaches do. So it was a vibe, that’s the word I’m looking for. That in-person event was a vibe for sure.
Lindsey: So good. Okay, so you’re off and your running and you’re just kind of Googling answers on coaching calls, get into Mango Magic and start to figure some things out. And then you kind of like, I mean, Mango Magic no longer exists, you kind of went off and started doing your own thing, blowing up. What did that part of your journey look like?
Whitney: So it looked like, you know, it’s interesting, my business has been such a dichotomy of I basically either triple or quadruple my income every year. But the first two and a half years still felt like a struggle.
So what I mean by that is I tried to give myself credit because I’m like, well, you’ve technically basically like triple your income every year. But when you only make $3,000, tripling your income the second year isn’t that much. So my first year I made 3k. And then my second year in business I made 13,000. So I basically added another 10,000, which I think I paid what, 2,000 for Mango Magic?
So I came out $8,000 ahead, right? So to me, I was like, I’m freaking doing it, look at me. And then my third year in business, I made 33,000. So again, it was like I was tripling my income, which was cool. But I was like 13,000 a year, 33,000 a year, that’s not going to cut it. And I was still working a full-time job because I couldn’t leave because I wasn’t making enough.
So those first couple years I was just kind of trying any and everything. I think that is something that has always worked for me, is I am a hungry person and I’m a go-getter. You know, I was a single mom, I was on food stamps, I was in government assisted housing. And so I think sometimes that plays to my advantage, that I’ve had to be scrappy and I’ve had to figure things out. And like I’m used to being the underdog. And I think I truly just applied that to my business.
And so I would I just remember I would look around and I would see other coaches just in communities I was in that were just struggling. And it was a lot of like whining, and like it’s not working, and boohooing. And they would just like go off and like avoid their business for two months. And I was not afforded that luxury.
And I think I just had that mentality of like single mom, food stamps, like we just figure shit out. And so for me it was never like, I didn’t get to just like whine about my business for two months while I avoided it. I was like, no, we’ve got to figure this out, we’re scrappy. And so anyways, I did 3,000, 13,000, 33,000, I don’t know what it is with the number three.
Lindsey: Yeah, I was just thinking that.
Whitney: Yeah, I don’t know, that’s weird. My fourth year of business was 2021. That was my fourth like full year and I made $110,000. So I went from 33,000 to 110. And then this year, I will end the year at multiple six figures. I’ve already crossed over, I think I’m almost at like 150,000 for this year and I have no doubt that I’ll well cross over 200,000 for this year.
I mean, I made 30,000 in August. So I was just thinking this morning, if I kept that up for the rest of the year I’ll be up in like 250,000 by the end of this year.
Lindsey: Yes, so freaking good. I think your story is really fun because you came to the mastermind and, I mean, we have people come from all different spaces, right? Some who have signed their first couple clients, they’ve made their $5,000, they qualify, they apply to the room and they’re working on creating more clients and money. You came to the mastermind making what, $110,000 last year.
Lindsey: So I’m so interested to hear, and I know of it, but I want you to share from your perspective, like where were you at at that point? You made $110,000, you applied to be in this room. Like what about this room? What did you need help with? And just tell me about that part of your journey.
Whitney: So yeah, I mean, I was thinking about that this morning when I was getting ready because I knew we would talk about the journey. So we applied, like in March, right?
Whitney: So I think what I was thinking to myself was I was fresh. I mean, in March you’re talking it’s been I mean two, two and a half months since I just closed in on 110,000 after making 33,000. And I had not set the goal in 2021 to make 100,000. Like I made 13,000, you know, and then 33,000. So I was not thinking, I was thinking I made 33,000 in 2020 so if I make like 50,000, 60,000 this year, that would be good.
So when I hit that at the end of the year I was like, holy crap. Basically January and February was me just spinning out of like, how am I going to keep, can I keep this? I don’t even know how I did that. It wasn’t even a goal, so how did I do that? Can I keep it? You’ve got to get in mentorship in the right room.
And I’m actually glad we’re talking about this because I was like, h, this is going to be such a fresh perspective that I don’t even know if anyone’s talked about on your podcast, is I didn’t have a coach. So I was actually in a coaching container, which I don’t condone this, but I do think there’s times where this just has to happen.
I was in a coaching container where I was working with two guys that are business, they do a business together. And so they have a coaching business together. And it was very like masculine, kind of like bro marketing. Like everything was just in the masculine energy.
And when I got to the end of 2021 and realized I was going to hit six figures, they kind of lured me in with this like come in, we’re going to show you how to build a sales team, and you’re going to hire setters. And it was like this whole like this is how we made like a million dollars our first year in business. I’m like, oh, maybe this is what I need to do to maintain.
So I had jumped in with them at the end of November. And just because of how I am, I basically was their star student, I made like 25k in December. I did really well the first couple weeks of January, but I just had this unsettling feeling where I was like, this is not how I want to build my business. I don’t want to have like, and it’s not anything wrong with it. Like it’s their jam, it just wasn’t mine.
And I started to feel really panicky because they came to me and they were like, “You’re killing it, you’ve only been here like two months. We want you to join our yearlong mastermind where we’re going to show you how to build a team, and you’re going to hire salespeople, and you’re going to hire all these setters that set your appointments, and we’re going to do lead generation software.”
And it was just all happening so fast. They were like, “And you’re not even going to have to coach at all in your programs, you’re going to hire people to do that.” And I was like, “Oh my gosh.” And so I just kind of was like, okay. So I commit to this year long mastermind that would have been all of this year, and it was very, very expensive.
And I started to feel very suffocated like I don’t think this is the kind of business I want to build. And I’m not trying to build a business where I’m completely detached from it. And it was just a lot of like pressuring.
And so, I mean, I’m rambling but I’m getting somewhere with this. I think it’s important, especially because your audience is a lot of women and I think this is an important conversation to have. I was thinking this is their kind of business and that’s okay, but this isn’t the business I want to have.
And I basically just finally made a decision like the second week of February. I was like, “Guys, we have to talk.” And I just got on Zoom with them and I was like, “Listen, this is not the kind of business I want to build. It works for you guys and that’s great, but it’s just not the business model I want to have. And I just don’t know that it makes sense for me to pay you guys all this money and be in a program for 12 months when this just isn’t the business I want to have. I’d appreciate it if I could just exit.”
And it was a lot of like, “Oh, but you said your goal for this year was 400,000 and you’re not even close to that. Don’t you think that’s a problem? And you’re just quitting on yourself.” And I just remember how small I felt and I was just kind of letting them say all these things to me and I just didn’t stand up for myself, you know? It was kind of like the patriarchy, right?
And the point that I’m making is I kind of let them convince me to stay. And then I took another week and finally I emailed them and I was like, “Guys, listen, I hear you, but I just can’t. This isn’t in alignment with me.” And they were like, “Okay, we get it, we support you.” And they blessed and released me and that was fine.
But the point I’m making is like I told my husband after that, I said, “You know, my last two business coaches were men,” and I don’t have a problem with men. I don’t know if people know this, I’ve been married three times so obviously I love men. I’ve been married to men every time, I love men. But I realized that I wanted feminine, I needed that feminine energy in a coach.
Because I have wounds with men in authority over me, it wasn’t their fault. But I realized I’m not in a place where I want to keep putting myself in containers where men are over me in that capacity because I play very small and I start to show up differently. And I feel like I’m not heard, and I feel like I’m not seen, and I feel like I’m not understood, and it feels really bad for me.
And I was like I need to get back into feminine energy and a feminine way of marketing and speaking to our, because it’s very different, right? The masculine energy in marketing is very different than the feminine energy in marketing. And somehow, I don’t even know why, all of a sudden it was like, you know, I’d been following you on Instagram and then all of a sudden it was like the universe was like, oh by the way, Lindsey’s mastermind is coming.
And I just told my husband like, “This is it. This is what I’m looking for. I’ve worked with Lindsey, I need to get back into her space.” And not that you don’t operate a little on both because we all do, right?
But I was like I want to be back in that female energy and the way that it’s not all that pain point marketing, it’s like empowering our clients, and loving our ideal clients, and attracting them into our world by the way we see them as amazing. Not damaged. And we don’t have to pressure them, we can empower them to work with us.
So I just knew, like the second you opened applications I filled it out the first day and I was basically just sitting around.
Lindsey: Yeah, you were messaging me, you were like, “I’m in.”
Whitney: I know, I told my husband, I was like, well, I don’t think we get our acceptance emails for like, I don’t remember, it was like two weeks or something. I was like, “I’m just sitting here waiting for my acceptance email so I can make my payment.” I felt like a little kid like waiting on the curb like waiting for dad to come get me. I was like, come pick me up, I want to make my payment now.
I just couldn’t wait to be back in your energy and your space. And that’s really what it was. It was like, I know Lindsey, she is such a genuine soul. She’s so kind, she’s powerful, she really like lives in that like, you know, there’s the masculine energy of like your personal power and like the structure of your business and going after what you want.
But it’s from this place of the feminine energy of like you don’t see your ideal client as disempowered and you have to save them and like you’re trying to pressure them into buying from you. And it’s like, I’m going to fix you. You’re like, no, I hold space for you to be powerful. And I knew I needed that.
And so I think that’s why I just came into the mastermind. I mean, I’ve had moments where I’m like, what is happening? But really, when I look at it, it’s all been so easy. And I feel like I’m floating and the money’s just showing up in my bank account. That’s seriously how I feel.
Lindsey: Yes. Oh my gosh, so fun. I can’t wait to share the money results. It’s like it’s so mind blowing.
It’s so fun to hear your perspective on that because I feel like that’s really what this container is about. I think there’s a huge balance of that, because I definitely have a pretty strong masculine energy as well. But it’s like connecting back to that desire. And I think that’s the whole goal of the container, is creating a life and business that aligns with what you want and getting clear on that and making sure that the decisions you’re making are leading you towards that.
Because I think so often we’ve had it drilled in our heads that we just have to like pressure ourselves, grind it out until we get to the goal. And then our brain tells us like once we’re there, then we will enjoy our life, then we’ll kick back, then we’ll relax.
And that’s not actually true because the way you build your business is how your brain believes you’re going to have to maintain your business. And then if you have a bigger goal, you’re going to have to use that same process to create the bigger goal.
And that’s really one of the things that we unwind in this room, is how you build your business is how you’re going to maintain it. And making sure you’re doing it in a way that aligns with the life that you really want. Because the reason why, on top of wanting to help people, of course, but the reason why you got into this business is so you could get everything that you wanted.
And if you’re sacrificing your life in the process of that, if you’re just grind, like banging your head against the wall pressuring yourself to get there, it’s like your nervous system can’t be calmed when you get there and it’s not going to know, you haven’t built the capacity or the ability to build your business in a way that aligns with you.
Whitney: So true.
Lindsey: So tell me more about that because I remember listening to your application video. Tell me more about like what your life looked like and your business together when you decided to join the mastermind.
Whitney: Yeah, I’m like, gosh, what did I say in that video? Who even knows because it feels like a lifetime ago. And it wasn’t, but my business looks so different. It doesn’t but it does. Like I feel like I’m on the trajectory that makes sense, but it also feels like I’m doing something very different.
And I think, like I said, I just posted this on my, I think my Instagram stories yesterday where I was like, “Dude, some people are not going to get this and they are going to think I’m talking like some real woo-woo stuff.” But I literally said, “I feel as if I’m just floating and money is just flowing to me.” Nothing feels hard, it doesn’t feel forced.
So I think what I would say is I came into the beginning of the year thinking okay, well, I made 110,000 last year and I know that I white knuckled that. I tell my clients all the time you can white knuckle your way to 100k. You can definitely force it, you can white knuckle it, you can force it. You’re not going to be able to sustain it, you will crash and burn.
And that’s what I did in 2021. I accomplished it and it was great because I made a lot of money and I got to do a lot of things and it really helped my family. But I got to a place at the beginning of the year where I started telling everyone, including my clients, I was like, “There are changes coming because I’m about to start burning shit down in my business.” Because I had built a business that I was not in love with and it was making me not want to show up in my business.
I was not in love with it and so I was like, “I don’t know what those changes are going to look like. You guys are going to ride it out with me or you’re not, and that’s totally fine, but I just have to start honoring the business I want to have long term.” And I was like, I’m just going to start burning things down.
And I wanted it to be a controlled burn though, and so I knew I needed mentorship and like I don’t just want to burn a six-figure business completely to ashes. But that’s what really, I think, lured me in, in the best way.
You had a podcast episode last enrollment window that was literally basically just, I don’t know what you called it, but you should have just call it exactly why you need to be in the room. And the whole podcast was basically like these are all the reasons you need to join. And I bet I listened to it four times and I was like, yeah.
And it was a lot of building a life and business you’re in love with and not sacrificing one for the other. And I was like, yeah, I want to keep this trajectory of six figures, and multiple six figures, and five figure months. But I don’t want to keep doing it with a business that I’m not in love with.
I loved my life, that wasn’t a problem. I wasn’t loving showing up to my business every day. And that was a problem.
Lindsey: That’s so good. And I think that’s so valuable because I’m excited for you to share more about the results that you’ve gotten in your business, we kind of touched on it earlier, but I think sometimes when you unwind that a lot of people think that means you have to take a step back, like that you have to do less in terms of income and clients.
And it’s like you’ve done both at the same time, which again, is really what this room is about, is like having it all, doing it your way, doing it the way that you want and not having to sacrifice the goals that you have in the process. So share with the audience what you’ve created now since being in the room.
Whitney: Yeah. So I think I posted this on one of the, like when we were reporting numbers. Because you were like, “Tell us cash received and then how much coaching you’ve sold.” And I was like, “I don’t ever know how much coaching I’ve sold because my accounting is so unorganized.” I always know how much cash I’ve received.
I’m like I don’t even know how much to keep track of coaching sold. And I think this is why, and so this will be really helpful for anyone that’s considering joining, is because there’s going to be people coming in at different stages I think for some of the other ladies it’s easier because they just have like the one thing that they sell, right? And because they choose to, right? So some of them are like, you know what, I’m only comfortable selling a group right now or a one on one. So they’re just tracking one thing.
And I was like, I’m in a place in business where I’m like I have this mastermind, and I have a group program, and sometimes I sell one-off offers, and I do payment plans. And I’m like, I don’t ever know what I’ve sold. But it’s all worked out, right? Like all of us can be in there at our different phases and it’s all cohesive.
So I would say, but here’s the cool thing, I don’t know how much coaching I’ve sold, but I can tell you cash received is going to blow the top off regardless. It is September 1st, so I made $30,000 in August cash received. That’s not coaching sold, that’s money that went into my bank account. And probably 30% of those people were on payment plans. So I made 30,000 plus whatever is going to come in over the next six to nine months.
In July alone, I made $20,000 cash. So in the last two months of the mastermind I’ve cash collected $50,000 just in the last two months. And then I’ve probably cash collected anywhere between 50 and 60k the other couple months. So I would say I’ve probably brought in a minimum of $100,000 in cash. It would have to be, since the mastermind started. It would have to be. I mean, yeah, because I made 50,000 in the last two months.
Whitney: Yeah, cash. Who knows what I’ve even sold, I’ve probably sold about 130,000. I’d say there’s probably about 30,000 in like payments that are coming in.
Whitney: Yeah. $100,000 like in my bank account.
Lindsey: So good. And you’re floating creating this.
Whitney: That’s how I feel.
Lindsey: Tell me more about that.
Whitney: So that’s the only word I can think of. And like I said, when I said it in my stories I thought, “Oh my god, my audience is going to be like, what are you even saying?”
But here’s something that I’ve really learned too being in your space, like especially in this container, and just the person I’m evolving into. And I think what this container has fostered inside of me is that when I went to post that, I literally thought to myself, “Oh my God, they’re going to be like, what is she even talking about?” They’re going to think she thinks she’s better than everybody. She’s one of those people now.
And then I thought to myself, “No, my people will get it. The people that are, my people that are for this level of my business will totally get what I’m saying.” Not because they’ve lived it, they’re going to get it because they also want it. They’re not going to be like, “What? Oh, she’s becoming one of those people, like she made money and now she’s all like elitist.” And I’m like, no, no, no, they will not. Because sometimes in the Christian space money can be taboo.
So I used to water myself down and think I couldn’t talk about the money I was making a certain way because it would trigger the other Christians and I wouldn’t be Christian enough for the Christians. And that’s something else I’ve stepped out of in this container is no, no, no, the work that we do on our ideal clients and our mindset around who we serve and how we market to them is my people get it.
And I don’t need to sit around and like harp on their pain points, or tell them how terrible their lives are and how I’m going to save them. I don’t get into that old like mad men day style copywriting. Because I have training in copywriting.
I have mentorship with copywriters and what I noticed is that there is a lot of old school like copywriting that’s still being taught where it’s like you harp on the pain points, you drill in the pain points, you like remind them how terrible their lives and businesses are, and then present your solution.
And what you teach, and even so many of your peers in this whole kind of space is like you don’t have to see your audience that way. Like you can see them as empowered, and amazing, and they don’t need to be fixed. And that basically you’re just the obvious next step on their journey to the life that they’re trying to create. Not because they hate their life, they want more.
And that’s not the way that you marketed to us. You weren’t like, “Oh, does your business and life just suck the life out you? I’ll show you how to fix it.” You really marketed to us like, “Your life and your business is amazing, we’re just going to make it more amazing. You’re never going to have to sacrifice either.”
So I truly feel like I’m just showing up and I feel like I’m cheating the system. Like I’m literally just making millions, I’m just going to call that into existence. I’m on a trajectory to have a seven figure business because I’m like at 300k now from the time I started, just by being, I feel like I’m getting paid to be myself. I legitimately feel like I’m getting paid to like just be myself.
People freaking love it. And so it makes me feel like I’m floating. I woke up today on the first of September and realized in the middle of the night I had gotten two recurring payments from clients. And I was like, oh, I made almost $700 before I even woke up at 5am. That’s a good way to start September 1st, I’ll take it.
And it’s like, I feel like I’m just floating and I wake up and then the money is just in the account every day.
Lindsey: So good.
Whitney: It is good.
Lindsey: That is what happens when you align the way that you’re thinking with what you’re doing and who you’re being. And I don’t want to get too woo either, but that’s one of the big focuses of our work in the room, is changing the way that you’re approaching your business, changing the way that you approach your life.
Because when you are showing up from this place, of oh my gosh, coaching has changed my life like, this is the most impactful work I can do. And then you’re just authentically sharing it, you can’t help but attract people who want it. It does feel like floating, you’re just authentically showing up as you and helping people and making money is a byproduct of it.
Versus when you’re forcing, and grinding, and thinking your results aren’t good enough or thinking it has to be hard. It creates an entirely different business. And I feel like that’s such a great example of the work that we do. We focus on like a couple of very pointed things, but they leave a huge impact on every action you take and the results you get from it.
Whitney: They really do. My focus this year, and it’s something like I work on it with my clients because, you know, and it’s funny, you probably experience this too. They’ll always be like, “Well, what do I do?” And I’m like, you’re asking the wrong question, it’s who do you need to be?
Because that’s something you teach us is like, yeah, I mean, there is strategy. But at the end of the day any strategy can work, it’s like who are you being? Because that’s how you’re going to love your life and your business, is who is showing up to your business every day? Who is that person? And like are you in touch with her and what she wants.
And that’s what really drew me in, is like when I left that other space and I kind of felt like I was being forced into this like one way and it’s just this way, and it’s the only way you can build your business. And I was like, but I don’t think this is the way I want to build it and this just feels so restrictive.
And like I just was looking down the road and I remember telling my husband like if I build my business this way, I’m going to be miserable. And if I don’t get out of this now, what am I going to do?
And so when I left, I was just like I don’t have a coach. And I really believe in having a coach, and I was like who’s going to be my mentor in this season? And the universe like put you on my radar, God like put you on my radar. And I was like, this is it, building a life and business that you love. And right now, I do not love my business and I will sabotage this business if I don’t fix that.
I knew that for sure because I know me and if I don’t love something, I will not continue in it. And I was like if I don’t course correct this now, this is not going to be another six figure year because I will stop showing up in this thing and I will completely burn it down, and it will not be a controlled burn.
So your container has allowed me to burn my business down in a controlled way that wasn’t nearly as scary. It wasn’t nearly as like, it wasn’t traumatizing, like all my clients didn’t just quit. I was very much able to find my footing and like, yeah, give myself permission to build a business I’m in love with and just know that the clients that are like, “You know what, I don’t think this is the space for me anymore,” that’s okay, I can bless and release them. That’s love.
And then there’s going to be some that choose to stay because they see where I’m headed and they’re even more committed to my containers because of where I’m going. There’s a push and a pull, which I think a lot of entrepreneurs are afraid of the push. But I’m like no, every time I would push someone away with the moves that I was making and the transitions I was making, it was just drawing my people closer.
And you just held a safe space for that because it hasn’t been perfect. I’ve had some months where I was like, “Nothing is working,” on the calls. And then I would get to the end of the month and be like, “Oh, well, actually, I made $20,000 this month.” So I guess something was working.
But you hold that safe space for us to basically be like, nothing is working. And we’re like, well, okay, it might be a little dramatic, let’s talk about it and then we figure it.
Lindsey: So good. So what’s your favorite part about being in this room?
Whitney: Oh my gosh, so I have to narrow it down. I’m like, oh, I have to narrow it down to one? You know what was really cool? I was like, how do I say that in a way that it’s not weird that that’s my favorite part? So this is the first mastermind, really this is the first anything, mastermind, group program, like anything where there was other people involved in the coaching that I was maybe, how do I say it? Like one of the top earners,
I’ve always been the underdog, which is actually cool. I don’t know if you and I coached on it, but I had a conversation with a friend since I’ve been in this mastermind and her and I had discovered that I actually struggle with not being the underdog. That’s my story, is that I’m the underdog. So that’s a whole other conversation, but I try to create situations where I have to be scrappy and I’m the underdog.
And so when I first came in I was like, I don’t know what to do. I think I might be the top earner in here, I don’t know, or close to it. And I was like, this is weird and I’m used to always being at the start and the underdog. And I’ve always had to fight to figure it out.
But what has been cool is like in the beginning I thought, oh my gosh, what if they don’t like me? And what if I’m like too, you know, as women it’s like what if I’m too successful? What if I’m too successful and people don’t like me, and they don’t want to be my friend?
Because anytime I’ve been in group programs, you always build those relationships because you’re in these programs with people that get you, and not everybody gets this journey as an online entrepreneur.
And I was like, what if I don’t make friends and like they just don’t want anything to do with me because I’m like too successful, right? Because I’ve always been told I’m too much. I’m too opinionated. You’re too this. You talk about money too much. You do all these things too much.
And here’s what’s interesting, I shared that. I think on one of the first calls I was just like, “I think I need to get coaching because I’m afraid to celebrate my success, or be in my success, or embody my success because I don’t want to trigger anyone or anyone to like write me off, or not like me, or think I’m like prideful or something.”
And all the women were like, “Oh my gosh, no, I want to be your best friend. Teach us everything, we can’t wait to learn from you. And like this is so cool and you’re you’re such an example of what’s possible.” And I was like, “What? You guys want to be my friend?”
And they were like, “Yes, girl. We don’t have any thoughts about it other than like that’s the beauty of this container, is it’s a melting pot of so many different lifestyles, and perspectives, and goals, and dreams, and visions. And everybody wants their business to look a little different and there’s nuance and it’s beautiful.”
They were so, they just embraced it. They were like, no, we’re already best friends. And I was like, oh, okay, you’re right, we’re already best friends. And it’s basically just been open ever since. Like, I don’t ever feel like there’s nothing I can’t get coached on.
Lindsey: That’s so good. I do really feel like this room is very special. Like the humans, I’m sure everybody thinks that about their room, but I just feel like the humans in it are just, everyone deeply cares. It’s like your results are their results, they are here for it.
And I was actually just writing a post today about how I think that’s the fun of this room, is nobody’s business looks the same. Which means that it brings all of these possibilities to you and what it could look like and what life and business can look like. Because I think sometimes it’s so easy to just take the like, you know, what everybody in the room is doing or what the leader is doing and, oh, it has to look like this.
And I think that’s the fun of this room, is that it’s like there are 100 different ways to do it and our goal is to get clear on your unique desires for your life and business and execute that. And I think it’s just a really powerful place to be. I mean, I know a lot of people have the thought like, will I belong in the room? And I think you can’t not, you just have to choose to believe you belong in the room and then you’ll be met with open arms and welcoming energy, because that’s just who these humans are.
Whitney: Absolutely. That’s what I was going to say, you have to decide. Like you won’t ever be in the room if you don’t decide. You just have to decide. You have to decide that you belong in the room because you chose to be in the room.
Lindsey: So good. So what would you say to somebody who is listening who’s like thinking about putting themselves in the room, but they haven’t decided yet?
Whitney: What would I say to them? I think what we were just talking about is, well here for one, especially as entrepreneurs, right, because that’s mostly who’s listening, is like unmade decisions are totally taking your energy from other parts of your business. So like that’s just a decision that you just need to make, is that you’re doing it or you’re not because it’s gonna free up so much space.
But here’s my thing, it’s on your radar for a reason. I don’t think things, I really, you know, I don’t get into that like super woo of like everything happens for a reason. But I do believe you’re considering it for a reason. So even if someone’s like, “Should I? Shouldn’t I? Do I belong? Don’t I?” The only reason you’re even considering joining is because there is a part of you that has decided you do belong in the room. And I would challenge you to lean into that part.
When people say like, “Well, I want to apply, but I don’t know, do I deserve to be in the room? Do I have good enough results?” And I’m like, you wouldn’t even be asking yourself those questions if there wasn’t some part of you that was like, “Girl, of course you do.” You would have just seen the mastermind was coming and you would have kept scrolling.
So the fact that like there’s a decision that needs to be made, but the fact that you even have the decision as an option, there is a part of you that not only believes you should be in that room, knows the kind of results you can create in that room. You know what’s possible for you and I almost would wonder if that small voice is not your future self calling you higher, right?
Lindsey: That’s so good.
Whitney: She may be so far in the future that it’s like a faint voice, and maybe that’s why some people are like, “Should I? Shouldn’t I?” I’m like imagine that that’s your future self off in the distance and she’s calling to you. And yes, it’s a little faint, because she’s a little far ahead. But are you going to walk to her? I would, I did. I do. And I truly know that’s why I am where I am now, because I invest in coaching and mentorship.
And at some point, this is one thing I can say about masterminds, at some point it is time to get out of the programs and get into mentorship. Like once you know your season is done being in a program and you know you’re ready for that high level mentorship, that is your future self offering you the gift of mentorship with people that have been there. And you should allow yourself that gift of true mentorship. And that’s what’s in the mastermind.
Lindsey: So good. And I think it would be really interesting to hear your thoughts on somebody who’s also like a higher earner, like you, and they’re thinking about joining the room.
Whitney: You know, it’s been really cool. Like once I got over like, oh, I don’t know what to do when I’m not the underdog. Like I don’t know what to do when I’m not lost and confused and having to fight and figure it out. Once I recognized that that was a story that I had, I kind of just like let that go. It was interesting, I didn’t have to get a lot of coaching on it, I was like, oh, yeah, that’s stupid, let me let that go.
And it’s actually been really cool for once to be not the underdog. And it’s done so much for my self-concept of like, because like I said, when I made that six figures I did not know that was going to happen. I made 33,000 the year before. I was like a single mom on food stamps. Like this was not the kind of money that I made.
So when I came into this year I was like, oh my gosh, can I do this again? Like it did so much for my self-concept to be like, yes, you can. Look what you’re doing every month in this mastermind and look how you get to pour in, like they pour into me. Especially with mindset stuff, it’s like I just adore all of them in the room. The mindset coaching they just bring as a group is like so powerful.
It doesn’t matter how much you’ve made, your mindset is your mindset, right? Anybody can coach you on your mindset, that’s the power of the room. It doesn’t matter if, like it doesn’t matter. But I always know I can go there for the mindset help that I need especially. But it’s been so cool to be like, no, it’s safe to be here, and it’s safe to be successful, and it’s safe this round to be one of the top earners.
And I don’t know, another round maybe I won’t be, right? And that would be cool too. It’s like you don’t ever know. So it’s like it’s safe for this round to be like one of the top earners. And it’s safe, Whitney, because you’re not going to lose it. There was a part of me that I think was afraid to be the top earner because I was like, but then all of them would see me if I fail.
Like if I just totally tanked this mastermind and didn’t make any money and flopped everything, they would all see it and I’d be so embarrassed. And I had to realize like, no, it’s safe to be here. It’s safe to be one of the top earners. And you need to sustain that so that you can continue to show them what’s possible and pour into them.
And it was kind of like me almost like paying back all the people that had poured into me even though it wasn’t them. I feel like you know what, I’ve been in spaces where there were top earners that, you know, they didn’t have to give me the time of day and they did, and they cared about me, and they coached me, and they called me up higher, and they wanted to see me win.
And now I don’t get to go back and do that for them, but I get to like pay it forward for the next people and be like, hey, I was a single mom on food stamps, I am not a freaking unicorn. Trust me, you guys can all do this. And I know they’re all, like they’re all exploding.
Like the call we had yesterday, I was like jeez, we’re exploding in here. Everyone just had all these wins and I was like holy crap, what’s in the water? And just to watch them, we were like in the chat like, what is even happening? And then they will get to also be some of the, I don’t know, for lack of a better term, like the mentors, right? Like you think like the camp counselors, right? For maybe the next round everybody just kind of moves up, right?
It’s like they’re starting to get crazy results, we all continue to grow and then maybe some people come in and they’re not, maybe they’re just signing their first clients. And then we all get to up-level our self-concept and take them under our wing.
But then the people that are already earning a lot of money, they get to come in and it’s still an up-level for your self-concept because you get to come in and realize like, oh, yeah, this is who I am like, this is what I do. And it’s safe to be here and I’m not going to lose it and it’s not a fluke.
I think that was the biggest thing for me, was like, Whitney, you don’t always have to be the underdog in the room to grow. You can grow not being the underdog. That was a big thing for me.
Lindsey: Yes, there’s so much growth in the having. Like the ability to believe this is, like I think about your highest self. It’s like you’re stepping into it, it’s available, you’re stepping into it and then you are her. And there’s so much growth in the you are her.
I think that doesn’t get talked about where it’s like you calm your nervous system and you just recognize this is who I am. And I think that that’s been your greatest work this round.
Whitney: Yeah, it has. It’s like this is safe, you’re not going to lose it. And I just had this story that I always had to be the underdog in order to grow. I was like, but if I’m not the underdog where’s the expansion? And it was like me having to learn you expand from here, you don’t have to fight all the time.
Whitney: That’s not a sustainable business, being in the fight 24/7, like you were saying about the nervous system. You can only sustain that for so long just fighting your nervous system all the time to grow. I got to learn how to grow from a place of like I’m already doing really well, now the work is learning how to expand when you’re already doing well.
It’s easy to grow when your business is struggling because you can see where you have to go. It’s like how do I grow when my business is already killing it? And then you’re like, where do I go from here? I’m already killing it. I had to learn what that looked like for me. And it looked like going from $10,000, $15,000 months to $20,000, $30,000 consistent months.
Lindsey: And feel like you’re floating while you’re doing it.
Whitney: I know, that was the growth.
Lindsey: So good, Whitney, I love it. So where can people connect with you and follow you?
Whitney: Yeah, so Instagram is my new playground. I’m just @xowhitneyb. That’s where I’m going to be playing from now on, so I don’t even send people other places.
Lindsey: Perfect. So good, I love it.
So if you are ready to join the room, applications open tomorrow, September 15th. This is the mastermind where you create a life and business where you have it all. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/A, B as in boy, A coach and we will see you on the inside.
Thank you so much, Whitney, I am so excited for people to hear this episode and I will talk to you soon.
If you’re ready to take this work deeper and create your own coaching business, join us in Anything But Average where I will walk you through the step by step process to become a coach, start your coaching business, and start signing clients. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and I will see you on the inside.