Ep #78: The Lies That Keep You Stuck

by Lindsey Mango Coaching | Podcast
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Our minds often feed us lies that really feel true, and half the battle is identifying what is actually true and what you would rather believe instead. This week, I’m challenging you to fight your ego and find that you might have thoughts and beliefs that don’t line up with creating the life, business, or relationships that you want.

I’m sharing 10 lies that I’ve found myself thinking that you might feel are true for you too. Even if these examples aren’t the exact thoughts you might be experiencing, I hope this helps you see where you might be buying into the lies your brain is telling you, to give yourself the opportunity to change them if you want new results. I’m diving into why we tend to believe the lies we tell ourselves, and I’m giving you one question you can always fall back on to determine whether you want to stick with it or not.

Join me this week as I share some truth on the way our brains are wired and why we always find evidence for the thoughts we think. If you’re feeling stuck in any area of your life and can’t seem to find a way out, this episode might be the key to unraveling a new path to get to your dream life.

I have a program called The Coach Business Academy, which focuses on helping service-based, heart-centered coaches and business owners attract and sign clients in their businesses. This is a program that is going to help you challenge beliefs that aren’t serving you and change them to bring your business to the next level. You also get lifetime access and lifetime support, so what are you waiting for? See you there!

WHAT YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE
  • Why our minds like to tell us lies and why we believe them.
  • The 10 lies that are keeping you stuck.
  • One question to ask yourself when the lies your brain is telling you feel true.
  • The main thought that kept me stuck jumping from job to job for years.

FEATURED ON THE SHOW
  • If you are ready to take this work deeper and make your dream business a reality,  join my Mango Magic Business Academy.
  • Or if you don’t have a business and you are ready to bring your dream life to reality and know you are meant for more, my Mango Magic Life School is also available.
  • Join me on Instagram and tag me in all your Soul CEO aha! moments!
  • Don’t forget to grab your free training of my High-Vibe Formula (how I created a multiple six-figure business, attracted the man of my dreams, and created a life with complete time freedom…in less than 18 months)!

LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE

FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Hi girl, welcome to Soul CEO; a podcast for women who know they’re destined for more. I’m Lindsey Mango and I’m going to show you that you can have it all and teach you how to get it by becoming the CEO of your soul, life, and business. Let’s get started.

Hello. How are you guys? I am so freaking excited to be here. Welcome back to another week and another episode with me. I am so freaking pumped that you guys are tuning in today, and before we jump into today’s topic, I apologize for my semi-funky voice.

Who knows if it will come through, but this past weekend was my bachelorette party. It was absolutely amazing. So much fun. And it was pretty laid back, I have to say. We only had one day where we went to a rooftop pool and had a few cocktails, or quite a few cocktails, and it was so much fun. But the rest of the nights I was like, a total grandma and I was like hey, do you guys want to go home and play games?

But we just had the most amazing time and I am just unapologetic about the fact that sometimes, I’m a grandma and I like to relax. And I just wanted to enjoy my weekend with my girls. So we just had so much fun and I got a little rundown so I’m recovering from a little bit of a cold.

But regardless, I am so excited to be here and today I am really pumped about what I’m going to talk about because I’ve been very aware of this concept or this idea that our mind likes to tell us lies. And our mind likes to tell us lies and we like to believe them because they keep us safe and they protect us.

So what we are actually going to dig into today is the 10 lies that are keeping you stuck. And it can be between business, life, relationships, all the things. I cross over all the boundaries. And I want to challenge you to really dig deep, and even if this isn’t the exact lie that you tell yourself, to identify if there is a similar lie you are telling yourself that is keeping you stuck.

And you guys might be thinking like, why would we tell ourselves lies? Aren’t they facts or aren’t the truth or what does this even mean? And the reality is that our mind is a lot less concerned with having thoughts and beliefs that serve us and more concerned with being right, and more concerned with staying safe.

And so as you guys are listening to these 10 lies that are keeping you stuck, you might hear some of them and you might be like, I don’t have that, but why would somebody believe that? And the reality is that whatever lies or whatever beliefs you have that are keeping you safe, that are holding you back, that are blaming things outside of yourself are ultimately making you stay comfortable, and they are ultimately keeping you from feeling empowered and being capable of really going after it in your life, in relationships, in business, or whatever it is.

So again, just remember your ego and your mind is going to fight like hell when you hear these things to say well, this feels really true. I have all the evidence in the world to believe this and to believe that this is the truth. And I just want to challenge you to ask yourself this question. Does it serve me to believe this?

This is a question that I ask myself whenever I uncover a belief or a thought or something that doesn’t really line up with me creating a result or that keeps coming up. I ask myself this question because if the answer is no, even if I do believe it to be true, if the answer is no, I know that I’m going to want to go to work to change it.

Because the reality is guys, I’m going to try to not be too nerdy on you but our mind looks for evidence to support whatever story we have. And when I say story, lies, belief, whatever you want to call it, it’s all really the same thing. Our mind literally sees evidence. So you will see evidence that this is so true and it’s because that’s literally how our brain is wired.

It’s the exact reason why – I’m sure you guys have been around negative people and they’re like, oh my gosh, there’s so much negativity everywhere and they have real evidence and they have bad situations that happen to them all the time, and it’s true for them. But then you could have the same experience or you could have a totally different experience and say like, no, everything amazing happens to me and you have tons of evidence.

It really is dictated by the stories, the beliefs, or the lies that we tell ourselves. So the reality is that you can tell yourself a different story and you can tell yourself a story or a belief and work on building it to a place where it really serves you instead of holds you back.

And one of the ideas or concept – I promise, I’m going to get to the 10 things, but one of the things that I think is most powerful to share with you guys because sometimes people, when I tell them that these are lies and that you can change them, which I will actually be covering how to change beliefs in the next episode.

But the thing is sometimes people have asked me, they’re like so wait, am I just lying to myself or making up something to tell myself a different story? What if it’s not true though, right? This is what I really believe. I have all this evidence. It feels like a fact. Am I just supposed to pretend that something else is true?

And here’s what I want to tell you. We are imagining or making up stories in our head no matter what. We are gathering information no matter what and creating stories about it no matter what. So the question I have for you is would you rather create stories and beliefs that serve you versus believe things that feel like fact that really aren’t, that hold you back?

If you’re going to be making it up anyway, if your brain is going to be making up this stuff anyway, wouldn’t you rather have things that help move you forward towards creating the life, the business, the relationship and the things that you want? You can be resistant to it and you can not like this idea or this theory, or you can challenge yourself to be open to it and give yourself the opportunity to change everything.

Alright, so let’s get to it. The 10 lies that are keeping you stuck, and there’s probably so many more but these are just the ones I thought of literally just now. Number one, life really doesn’t get to be that good or maybe you follow people and you think they really aren’t that happy, or they can’t be that happy.

This is one for me that actually came up in former relationships, before I met my fiancé Chris. I used to think like, oh yeah, they’re not really that happy. They just pretend to be. Or I would follow people on social media and I would think like, I’m sure that there’s something not that great about their life.

A lot of you guys might actually have this. And it might feel very true, but I want you to see what this is protecting you from. This is protecting you from believing that something more and better is possible, which is going to create a dissonance in how you feel about your current life. So it feels a lot better to just believe this. Do you guys see what I’m saying there?

Alright, so number two. They must have had some advantage to create their success. Maybe their timing was better, maybe they had a bigger audience. Maybe they got an opportunity that you didn’t get to have. So it’s kind of like this idea of life isn’t fair. This keeps you stuck because it keeps you from thinking that you could be further along than you are, or it keeps you from believing that this is possible for you and feeling safe and comfy exactly where you are.

Number three. This is just the way life is. Oh man, this thought kept me stuck for so long. I remember when I worked my seventh corporate job, this is the thought that kept me jumping around from job to job and just staying exactly where I was because I was like, this is just the way life is. People just work jobs that they don’t like and then they retire. But you see that that thought kept me safe. It kept me doing things that felt comfortable, that kept me comfortable in kind of the pain that I felt when I had to show up at a job that I didn’t love.

Alright, number four. I’ll wait until x, y, z is over before I do the thing I want to do. This is a huge one. So many business owners come to me and they’re like, once I quit my job, then I’ll feel more confident, then I’ll have more time, then I’ll have all these things. And the reality is this is keeping you from really going after what you want and stepping into who you’re meant to be right now because it really is a mentality.

So if you didn’t believe this lie, what would you have to expect of yourself or what would you be motivated to do, or what would you have to do? Maybe create time for the things that you really, really want to. Maybe you get really, really good at managing your time.

Alright, number five. I’m not like “those” people or I’m not outgoing, or confident, or a people person, so I just can’t do, be, or have that. This keeps you doing exactly what you’re doing again. And it makes other people seem like oh, they’ve got some special talent so I just get to stay safe and do exactly what I’m doing.

Number six. I’m not ready. I’m not ready keeps you from going for it. It keeps you from taking the leap. It keeps you from getting outside of your comfort zone. Really, all of these do.

Number seven. This one pertains to relationships. There aren’t men out there like that. Or let’s apply it to all the things. There aren’t men, people, humans out there like that, whatever it is that you want. So what this does is it keeps you staying in the same type of relationships, or it keeps you surrounded by the same type of friends because you’re like well, if there’s nobody out there that I really want to be around then I can just settle for this, and it keeps you comfortable and feeling okay about staying where you are.

Number eight. I am just one of those people who needs security, a safety net, or wants to be alone. You have to really dig deep and think like, why would I tell myself that I’m just one of those people who needs security or a safety net? Because it keeps you safe. Because it keeps you from taking leaps. Because it keeps you from really doing the things that you really want to do until you have the safety net. That the reality is safety and security comes from your mind no matter what.

Number nine. Once I have x, y, z, then I’ll be happy. This keeps the ego alive. This keeps this whole belief that you have to fight and keep going after and chasing your happiness, which also keeps you safe. It keeps you comfortable. I know that sounds crazy.

You’re like, well why wouldn’t I just want happiness? Why wouldn’t I just choose it right now? My question is well, why don’t you? Because you can. But what would you have to do? What would you have to believe? What would have to change? What would you have to be wrong about for that to be true?

Number 10. My problem is unique. No one will get it and no one will be able to help me. This again keeps you safe. It keeps you from asking for help. It keeps you from really growing past your unique problem because it’s unique and nobody else will understand it.

So these are the 10 lies that came up for me when I really just was like okay, what are the things that I hear a lot from clients and people? What did I hear from myself? And I just want you guys to be aware, whether you have all 10 of these or whether you realized when you were listening to this that you believe something that doesn’t serve you, that doesn’t help you live and create the life, the business, the relationships that you truly want, I just want you to challenge yourself to think what if this wasn’t true?

What would that mean? And how can I be okay if this wasn’t true? What would I want to believe instead? So I’m super excited to hear y’alls feedback about this episode. Share it with your audience, share it with me, tag me in your Instagram story. My Instagram handle is @lindseymango_.

I love to hear from you guys and I would love to hear which one you connected with the most. Also, I have a program called The Coach Business Academy that focuses on helping service-based, heart-centered coaches or business owners attract and sign clients in their business. So whether you’re a coach or you want to be a coach, or you have some sort of service-based business, this is a program that’s going to help you challenge all of these types of beliefs and change them so they can help you bring it to the next level.

If that’s something you want more information on, go to lindseymangocoaching.com/coachacademy. It is open for enrollment at any time. I love you guys. I would love to see you on the inside of that program. You get lifetime access, lifetime support. I have a guarantee with it, and you wouldn’t believe the amount of ways that we challenge beliefs and thoughts like this that are holding you back to help you take it to the next level and sign all the clients you want.

I love you guys. I hope you have a beautiful day and I will talk to you soon. Bye.

Thank you for tuning into today’s episode of Soul CEO. If you are ready to take this work deeper and you want to bring your dream business or a reality, I wanted to make sure that you knew that Mango Magic Business Academy was available to you. Head to lindseymangocoaching.com/mangomagic.

Or if you don’t have a business and you are ready to bring your dream life to a reality and know you are meant for more, my Mango Magic Life School is also available. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/mangomagiclifeschool for all the details. These programs are both life and business changing and you get access and coaching with me to walk through the modules and ask questions and get support to make your dream life or your dream business, or both a reality. I love you. I can’t wait to see you in there.

I love hearing from you!

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