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Ep #92: When You’ve Quit Before

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If you’ve ever quit something in your life, welcome to the club. I’ve been right there with you. I quit seven corporate jobs and two network marketing businesses, and it was an asset at the time to leave that behind for something better, but without deeper awareness, the desire to quit can act as a trap. 

Quitting is the biggest reason so many coaches don’t decide to start their coaching business. They lack the self-trust to follow through on their dream life and business, even though it’s what they really want deep down, and this is exactly what I help them build in my work.

If you’ve had a history of quitting in any area of your life, this episode is for you. I’m showing you the 3 most common reasons people quit, and how to begin taking charge of building the trust you need to keep going, no matter the results you are creating.

If you want to know how to launch your coaching business in just three days, you have to register for my Three Days to Launch training. This is a three-day event taking place from January 3rd to the 5th, and registration is now open!

Anything but Average is opening for enrollment from January 5th to the 11th! If you want to become a great coach, start your coaching business, and sign clients, make sure to click here and join the waitlist to be put on an exclusive email list where you’ll get sneak peeks inside the program before it reopens!

The next round of the Anything but Average Coach Mastermind opens on February 23rd for the spring of 2022 class! If you missed out on this current round, make sure to mark your calendars so you don’t miss out!

What You'll Learn on this Episode

  • Why quitting is not a character flaw. 
  • 3 reasons people quit. 
  • How to build trust in yourself so you know you won’t quit. 
  • 2 things you need to know so you can decide to start your coaching business. 

Featured on the Show

  • If you are ready to take this work deeper and make your dream coaching business a reality, join my Anything but Average program.
  • Join me on Instagram and tag me in all your Anything but Average aha! moments!
LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE

Click to Read Episode Transcript

Welcome to the Anything But Average podcast where I will teach you how to create a coaching business one step at a time. I’m Lindsey Mango, a life coach passionate about helping you create the life of your wildest dreams by creating a coaching business. Let’s get started.

Hello and welcome back to another week and another episode of Anything But Average. Guys, how are you? I hope you had a wonderful holiday and you’re still enjoying it. I cannot believe it’s almost 2022. What? I feel like I saw something the other day and it said 2001, and I was like, “That wasn’t that long ago.” And then I was like, “Oh my gosh, it’s 21 years ago.”

The fact that I can easily fit 21 years into my life makes me feel a little frightened. Anyway, I hope you guys have an amazing and safe New Year’s Eve. I am so excited for next year, I know so many of you guys are. And we are gearing up to open up Anything But Average again for enrollment.

So if you are ready to become a great coach, start your coaching business and sign paying clients, make sure to get on the wait list, lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage. Click the link, you’ll get exclusive sneak peeks into the program, into what the weekly live coaching sessions are like, and just lots of goodness, as well as the opportunity to join Anything But Average as soon as it opens.

Before we dive in, I mentioned this on last week’s episode, Monday kicks off our three day free training extravaganza called Three Days to Launch. I only do this event twice a year. It’s three days of three one hour calls, one hour lives where I walk through the step by step process to launch your coaching business in three days.

There’s a Facebook group, there’s homework, this is a value packed training. So if you want to start a coaching business in 2022, if you have been putting it off, if you are even curious about coaching and what it’s all about, or maybe you’ve launched but you haven’t been signing the clients that you really want, make sure to get in this free training. The link to join is lindseymangocoaching.com/3daystolaunch. The link will be in the show notes. I’ll see you guys on the inside, we kick off on Monday, January 3rd to the 5th.

All right, so today what I wanted to talk about is quitting. The reason why I want to talk about quitting is because I see one of the biggest reasons why people are hesitant to decide to start their coaching business is because they don’t trust themselves because they think they’re going to quit.

And they have various reasons to believe that in their head. And I get it, I’ve been there. Trust me, I quit seven corporate jobs and two network marketing businesses. But they lack the trust because they have tried to start other businesses and they quit. Or maybe you’ve started your coaching business and you find yourself kind of quitting on it.

Or maybe just other areas of your life you notice you start something and then 30 days in you stop. And so you don’t believe that you’re going to follow through on starting the coaching business, even though deep down it’s something that you really, really want.

So today, what I want to talk about, or what I want to share with you guys is that quitting is not a character flaw. Meaning it’s not like your eyes are green. It’s not just, you are a quitter and that is just who you are. And that’s a fact about you. And it doesn’t matter what you do, you will quit on anything that you try and you will quit on starting your coaching business. No, quitting is a result you create.

So what we’re going to talk about is why you quit and what causes it so that you can be on to yourself, change it, build trust in yourself that you won’t quit, so that you can decide to start your coaching business and go after your dream.

So the thing I want you guys to leave with is that if you’ve quit things in your life, welcome to the club. I’m not sure there’s anyone that’s never quit anything in their whole entire life. I actually see it as an asset that you’re willing to leave something behind to go find something better. Like thank God we’ve all quit things, left that relationship, left that job that wasn’t serving us.

And I want you to remember that you are not flawed if you have quit things and you don’t trust yourself. That this is a result that you can change. Now, there’s two main things you need to know and understand in order to trust yourself so that you can start your coaching business and not quit.

The first thing is that when you believe you could quit or you’re afraid you could quit, recognizing that what you do is you quit ahead of time. Really think about that for a second. If you’re like, “I’m afraid to join ABA, and I’m afraid to start my coaching business because I’ve quit things before. I never follow through.” What ends up happening?

You don’t even try. You talk yourself out of it. And when you don’t even try, you’re still quitting. You’re quitting ahead of time. You’re quitting before you even give yourself a chance. So I just want to show you guys that believing you’re going to quit creates the results of quitting, that’s it. Again, it’s not you, it’s that you believe you’re going to quit and then you don’t even give yourself a fighting chance.

Now the second thing I want you guys to be aware of, and really the meat and potatoes of this episode, is figuring out why you quit. Digging into what’s causing this to happen. Why did you leave the network marketing businesses behind? Why did you quit the jobs or the relationships? Why is that happening? What’s the cause?

We heal that, we solve for that, you’ll never quit again. Or you won’t see quitting as a problem, you’ll see it as like this is the step in the right direction. This is where I want to go so it’s not quitting, it’s pivoting.

So there are three big reasons why people quit. The first reason is they’re not getting the results that they want. They’re not seeing the results, the transformation. They’re not seeing the weight loss. They’re not seeing the clients fast enough or the money fast enough. And so they quit.

The reason why is because they don’t know how to create the feeling of success, the certainty that they’re going to succeed ahead of time. So they rely, you rely, and trust me, I’ve been there, on the results to prove whether they should keep going.

I want you to think about that, let’s use weight loss. If your goal is to lose 20 pounds this year and you’re relying on the scale to move to keep going, you might feel really excited the first seven days. But there’s always some sort of lull throughout that process, right? There’s always a period of time where the scale is not moving a pound down every day.

There’s a part where you have to trust that it’s working and you keep going. And you have to motivate yourself to keep going by not relying on the scale to move. If you rely on that, you’ll quit. If you rely on staying motivated only when you see results, you will quit. I can guarantee it.

And that’s why so many people go all in for a certain period of time and all out. That’s the cause, they rely on the results to motivate themselves to keep going and when they don’t see it, then they quit.

There’s a simple way to solve this. This is something I teach in Anything But Average, how to create that motivation. How to be in charge of feeling good and continuing down a process, no matter what results you’re creating. Because you know how you’re guaranteed to not get the result you want, is to quit, right?

If you keep going, if you keep learning, if you keep adjusting and figuring it out, you’ll get closer and closer to the outcome you want until you have it. And then you will keep going after that because you’re not just relying on the results to motivate yourself, you’re relying on yourself. You’re relying on your brain and your feelings to create the motivation you need to continue forward.

So if you quit on something in the past because you didn’t see the results fast enough, I just want you to know the simple solution to changing it is learning how to create motivation, learning how to create consistency by motivating yourself through other things, through other reasons why you want to keep going. Period, end of story.

This is what changed my relationship with my health. Because I used to go hard for 30 days, and then I would binge on a giant bag of peanut butter m&ms for a whole weekend, and I would start back over. It’s because I was, actually for me I was using like my body is not good enough to motivate me. And then when I finally lost the weight, then I’d be like, “It’s great!” And I would just bend and that would be the whole cycle.

So we will solve for this in the program. Even if you’re still afraid that you might quit, we are going to work on this so that you have the certainty that you’re going to keep going until you create the outcome you want.

The second reason why people quit is because the reason why they started in the first place wasn’t a good enough reason to start, wasn’t a reason that was going to keep them going when it got hard. So for example, for my journey, when I started network marketing businesses, I started them because I just wanted freedom.

I wanted the results so bad and so I just picked this business. And I connected with it, but it wasn’t like my true deep passion. Because I thought this is going to get me out of where I feel terrible and bad about my life. This is going to fix it.

And that wasn’t a good enough reason to keep going. I’ve used this example before, it’s like marrying someone because you like the idea of being married, but not marrying the person you really want to marry, that you really want to choose for the rest of your life.

So your other businesses, your other things you quit on because at the beginning, the foundational decision that got you into that business wasn’t, “I’m deeply passionate about this and I’m willing to fight for it until the end of time.” It was, “I really want this result, so I’m going to try to fit this thing into my life.” And then again, goes back to number one, when you weren’t seeing the results then you weren’t passionate about how you were getting there, and of course you quit.

So how do you solve for this for starting a coaching business? Is starting a coaching business something you feel deeply passionate about? And even if you’re not clear, which next week we’re going to talk about actually deciding, how to decide whether you’re going to start a coaching business or not because some of you guys get stuck there too.

So you might not fully know if coaching, like you haven’t coached yet, how do you know if it’s your thing? But is it close? Do you want to help people? Do you want to have total freedom? Do you want to do something meaningful and purposeful with your life? And if the answer is yes, you are connected to coaching, coaching is your thing.

Now the how we’re going to do that will look different for everyone. And we shape that and build that in the program to fit your life and to fit your deep purpose and passion. That’s the beauty of a coaching business. And in the program, we find your unique purpose, the thing that you’re willing to fight for no matter what. And we turn that into a coaching business.

So you can guarantee you’re going to choose something that you actually love. That you’re not going to fall in that same trap of choosing something just because. Now, some of you guys want to start a coaching business for freedom. Girl, join the club. Girl or boy, or human, join the club, me too.

But the reason why coaching worked for me was because I was like, “Oh my gosh, this is life changing. People need this. This is what I’m meant to do.” And I was willing to fight for that until the end of time, so I knew I would never quit on it. And we make sure that you create that connection with your business in the program.

But again, why you quit is the beginning, the foundational decision you made with the business or with the thing. Maybe you picked this person to marry or be with just because you wanted to fill a hole in your life or you wanted to make excuses for them and how they might change. The foundational decision wasn’t made from a clean place.

The last reason, which I’ve kind of talked about throughout all of this is why you quit is because you didn’t have a big enough reason to keep going. That sounds super cliche, but you have to have a big enough reason to fight through the discomfort, the failure, the growth that it takes to get the outcome you want. That’s in marriage, that’s in health, that’s in starting your coaching business.

So again, whether you have that or not we work on that in the program and getting really clear on that for yourself so that you can fight through anything that shows up to try to get in your way. Because here’s the thing, if you’ve been waiting for the right time to start your coaching business, I promise you there’s going to be a time in your coaching business where it is not favorable circumstances to keep going.

You have to learn how to be a person who keeps going regardless. If you quit when you run out of time, or when things get busy, or when life gets hectic, your reason isn’t big enough.

Think about it like this, think about your dog or your kid. Is there any part of you that no matter what was happening in life that would stop taking care of that? Absolutely not. Because the reason is big enough. If you find that reason, if you have that reason, if you hold on to that reason and you remember it, you will never quit on your dream, you will never quit on your coaching business.

And that might change over time. Like when I first started, freedom and changing people’s lives was that reason. Now I have all the freedom I could ever ask for. And now my deep reason is back to also where I started which is all of you. I can’t imagine waking up every single day and not helping more of you create this life, create the coaching business.

I think about how much I was suffering, and if people didn’t share this opportunity with me, I wouldn’t be here today. And the other reason is I know that this pushes me to grow in new and different ways. And I always want to be the example for my daughter. That, for me, it’s like no matter what happens in my life, I will never quit. And that muscle is also built over time.

So I want you guys to remember, you are not a quitter. This is not something that is just a fact about you. There’s a reason why you quit. You solve for that, we work on that in the program, you will never quit on your coaching business. You will never stop showing up. We start with that in the pre-work of the program.

All right, I love you guys. I will see you in the three day free training. I will see you on the inside of Anything But Average when it opens on January 5th, and I will talk to you next week. Happy New Years. See you in 2022, had to say it. Feel like it’s a mom joke. I’ll talk to you guys next week. Bye.

If you’re ready to take this work deeper and create your own coaching business, join us in Anything But Average where I will walk you through the step by step process to become a coach, start your coaching business, and start signing clients. Go to lindseymangocoaching.com/anythingbutaverage and I will see you on the inside.

I love hearing from you!

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